Walk jokes

You're so ugly whenever you say hi, people walk away and say that you were too ugly, and they go take a bath right away because you're so stinky.

They say that you look like your mama. Wait, your mama must be just like you because I can see her way from a mile!

You say you put on perfume, but every time I smell you, you smell like poo-poo. You're so ugly that when your mom looks in the mirror, you cry. You're so stupid the second-grade teacher had to tell you to go all the way to kindergarten. Head Start is every grade below you. You can't even go to the 20th grade, which stands for 9th grade. You can't even go to grocery stores, and people that tell you that you're so ugly give you compliments just to make you feel better. You know that everybody just likes you just because they just don't want to hurt your feelings, so just stay in your mind. Hey, you want to text Matt; you know it was you because every time you see you, you think that you matter. Matter fact, he doesn't even like you; he just wants your money girl. Who even likes you? 😈😈

What time is it when you get home? Can you walk, walk home? Was your night night? You had fun? I had dinner, night time, and a tree. I had dinner. Is it a magic time? Dinner! I have been home. Was good.

My and my penis never truly understood the words "Booby traps" until we met the ex-wife. God's gift of self-will was working fine until my penis went hard and my mind went blank, and God started laughing, and I swear I heard him say, "Booby trap" as he walked away! True story.

What time is it when you cannot walk? Time to get a wheelchair 🦽.

Yo mama is so short, Minions look down at her.

Yo mama is so fat that she volunteered for the Hunger Games 'cause she thought it was an eating competition.

Yo mama is so ugly when Santa Claus saw her, he yelled "Ho Ho Holy Sh*t!"

Yo mama is so old, when she walked into an antique store, they didn't let her leave.

Yo mama is so stupid, she sold her car for gas money.

Three Jewish people walk into a bar.

How does a tree get online? They log in.

So I was walking.

One day, the Pope is coming to America in his limo, and he said to the driver, "Why don’t you let me drive for once?"

The driver thinks to himself, "Well, I can’t say no to this guy; he’s the Pope." So the driver pulls over, and they change places. The Pope was having fun, hauling butt down the freeway, dogging cars. After a while, the driver taps on the window and tells the Pope, "Slow down a bit; you might get pulled over."

The Pope says, "Ahhh, don’t worry about it; I’m the Pope." So he rolls up the window and continues to drive very fast. After a few moments, he gets pulled over. The cop walks to the car, and the Pope rolls down the tinted window. The cop sees the Pope and says, "Oh, I, ehhh, sorry, can you hold on a minute?"

The Pope says, "Sure." The cop walks back to his car and radios back to the station. He says, "Guys, I just pulled over someone really important."

They ask who, "The President?"

"No, more important."

"The president of another country?"

"No, more important."

"An ambassador?"

"No, even more important."

"Well, who is it?"

"I don’t know, but the Pope is the chauffeur."

Why couldn't the clown walk after his infamous knife-juggling act?

Because he was exhausted nigaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!

You walk into your grandma's room and you see her naked and she says "Come here grandson." What would you do?

You're walking on the street when you realize that you're in the road as you feel the horn dying away.

Frank Bulgin is freaky bold, A man with a spirit untamed, untold. With eyes that pierce through the darkest night, He walks a path that's far from light.

His steps are loud, his presence strong, A force of nature, where he belongs. Through the chaos, he finds his way, Leaving footprints that never fade.

A rebel soul, unafraid to speak, His words drip with passion, so unique. He dances with danger, embraces the unknown, Challenging limits, into the wild he's thrown.

No rules can bind him, no walls can contain, Frank Bulgin sets fire to the mundane. He paints the sky with vibrant hues, A kaleidoscope of dreams he pursues.

In his mind, a symphony of thoughts, An artist's palette, where inspiration is sought. He weaves words like a masterful bard, Creating tapestries that leave us marred.

With each verse, he unravels his soul, Unveiling the depths that make him whole. His poetry, a window to his essence, A glimpse into a world of fearless presence.

Frank Bulgin is freaky bold, A maverick, a legend yet to be told. His spirit roams, forever untamed, A beacon of courage, never to be tamed.

Stan Lee walked into a school one day.

Just kidding, he's fuckin dead :(

Dolly Parton and Queen Elizabeth went to the Pearly Gates on the same day.

They both met with an Angel to find out if they would be admitted to Heaven.

The angel said, "Unfortunately, there's only one space in Heaven today, so I must decide which one of you will be admitted."

The Angel asked Dolly if there was some particular reason why she should go to Heaven.

Dolly took off her top and said, "Look at these, they're the most perfect breasts God ever created, and I'm sure it will please God to be able to see them every day, for eternity."

The Angel thanked Dolly and asked Her Majesty, Queen Elizabeth, the same question.

The Queen walked over to a toilet, pulled the lever, and flushed it without saying a word.

The Angel immediately said, "OK, your Majesty, you may go into Heaven."

Dolly was outraged and asked, "What was that all about? I showed you two of God's own perfect creations, and you turned me down. She simply flushed a commode, and she got admitted to Heaven! Would you explain that to me?"

"Sorry, Dolly," said the Angel, "but even in Heaven, a royal flush beats a pair - no matter how big they are."

Little Timmy walked in on his parents having sex. His parents look at him in fear. Little Timmy asks, "Mom, Dad, what are you doing?"

The mom replies with, "We are playing house. We'll let you play when you're older," the dad says. So the next day Timmy goes over to play with his friend Johnny, who was, ironically, Timmy's neighbor. Johnny asks, "How was your sleep last night?" "I saw my mom and dad playing house last night," Timmy says. "But they told me I could play with them when I'm older."

After a little bit of playing with Johnny, Timmy went home and saw his Dad playing house with his babysitter. "Dad, what are you doing?" Timmy asks. "I'm playing house with your babysitter," Timmy's Dad said. "But I saw you play house with Mom last night," Timmy told his father. "Well, don't tell your mother," his dad said.

A man walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a beer. After 10 shots of vodka, the guy had, the bartender figured if he talked to him, he would tell him everything as he’s not sober.

Bartender: Hey, that’s some nice jewellery you have there. It must be expensive.

Guy: Yeah, this bracelet is made of 100% diamond. It cost me like 250 thousand dollars. What a bargain, eh?

Bartender: Seems like you make a lot of money. What do you do for a living?

Guy: I take cash from the bank and don’t give it back. It takes a lot of moral courage to rob banks to provide for my family.

Bartender: What? If that’s the case, then why do you even pay for the jewellery or this beer? You’re a hypocrite, that’s what you are, justifying robbing people as a living.

Guy: Hypocrite? You’re right. I'm living with double standards to justify my actions.

(5 seconds later)

Guy: Aye, open the cash register and give me your wallet or I will blow your fucking brains out. I fucking hate hypocrites and I will not gonna be one of em!

GBM when he sees Soph (gets a boner) and has sex with Soph but realizes he forgot to put on a condom. Soph: "This is why Arsenal fans are so deluded and retarded."

Normal Fans after they lose the game: Good game, you guys played really well. GBM: "BRO REF WHAT THE BLOODY HELL YOU DELUDED ASS RETARD, OMFG WE LOST BECAUSE OF THIS REF!"

Adapt: Hey Adapt, did you know you're smart? Smart for being retarded. Yo Adapt!! You're so stupid that you gave me your Roblox account info and you said thanks about it!!

Barca fans after the LFC vs Barca game: We bottled it, damn it, we'll win the Copa Del Rey tho. Commie after the LFC vs Barca game: "YOU NEVER WALK ALONEEEEEEEEEE" Normal People: I support only 1 team. Commie: I support Barca, LFC, and AEK!! And I'm the biggest plastic in the server!!

A guy once went hunting at a hunting ranch. After a long day of hunting, the hunter enjoys a couple of cold ones in the rancher’s living room. There they were having a grand ole time then the rancher’s wife walks in. The hunter says, “That’s a nice piece of ass you got yourself there.” The rancher replied with a harsh, raspy Southern chuckle from years of Marlboro Reds, “You’ve never been so right in your life. Honey, why don’t you show our guest your tits?” She agrees and shows the hunter her plump DD cup breasts.

The hunter says, “Nice.” Then the rancher said, “Show ‘em yer pecker now.” She agreed and whipped out a 13 incher. Dazed and confused, the hunter says, “What in Sam Hill is that?!” And the rancher replied, “Now... lemme tell you... there ain’t a thing like it.”

An ugly man with a gun walks into a bar. He sees a woman and falls in love with her.

Man: "Hey, cute lady!"

Woman: "Leave me alone, you ugly two-faced man! I already have a boyfriend."

Man: "Not for long!"

And then the man shoots the woman's boyfriend.

Woman: "How dare you murder such a beautiful man!"

Man: "Now you shall be my girlfriend."

Woman: "Never."

And then the man takes the seat that the woman's boyfriend was sitting in before.

Man: "You look like a dream."

Woman: "Then open up your ugly eyes and stop sleeping, murder."

Man: "What's it like being the most beautiful girl in the world, compared to all those ugly women? Bleuch!"

Woman: "What's it like being the ugliest mother f***ing murder in the world, compared to all those beautiful men?"

And then the man orders flowers and candy.

Bartender: "We don't serve flowers, or candy."

And the man shoots the bartender.

Another man can't believe what he just saw, so he strangles the first man and throws him out.