Walk

Walk jokes

School

When your crush walks in class, but you're homeschooled...

Psychiatrist

A patient walked into a psychiatrist's office last week wrapped in nothing but Saran Wrap. The psychiatrist said, "I can clearly see your nuts."

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  • A black guy walks into a store to buy some watermelon and fried chicken. The cashier says, "That'll be $20." He pulls out his wallet, but it's empty. Suddenly, a bigger black guy bursts in, grabs him, and says, "Time to pay up, n***a!" Then he bends him over the counter and fucks him in the ass.

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  • Peter Griffin

    Peter Griffin walks into a bar.

    Peter Griffin walks into a bar.

    Peter Griffin walks into a bar.

    I think I may have forgotten the rest of the joke.

    A burglar breaks into the home of a weapons engineer. He wants to steal some of his weapons from his strictly secured chamber. When he breaks in through the window to go into his weapons cellar, he realizes that the inventor is at home and heard him from upstairs.

    The burglar shouts, "Hands up, there is no escape!" The engineer shouts, "What do you want from me?" The thief answers impatiently, "Well, what do you think? I know what you're hiding here. Get me entry to your armory, right away!" "Never in my life will I do that!" The burglar pulls out his pistol, "Either you let me in, or you go for it!"

    "Well, I'll give up, I'll give you my guns. Please don't shoot me." The burglar grins gleefully, "Thank you." "I even have a gun here that I've been working on lately. You can have it." The burglar then thinks and grunts, "Okay, before you open up, you'll show me this first!"

    The inventor says, "It's shooting plasma. You can test it on one of my practice goals that I've made while I'm unlocking," and points to a side room where various dummies with targets are set up. The burglar walks into the room with the targets, focuses on the red dot in the middle of the disc, and pushes off. But the gun does not fire plasma or at the target. Instead, the gun fires a bullet at the burglar. This causes him to bleed to the ground.

    The engineer behind him began to laugh, "Hahaha! I knew you were falling for it! This is not a plasma gun at all; this is my latest invention, especially for burglars like you: the backward-shooting pistol."

    Mama

    Your mama so fat, when she walked past the TV, you missed two episodes.

    An old woman walks into an outdoor supplies store.

    "I'd like an infrared gorilla," she says.

    The clerk proceeds to give her an infrared gorilla from the back room.

    "We've had hundreds of these things in the back for ages," exclaims the clerk. "You're the first person who's actually wanted one."

    Aboriginal

    An Abo walks into a pub with a seagull on his shoulder. The barman asks, "Where did you find that?" The seagull replied, "At the tip, mate, there are lots there."

    Disabled

    Man, this walk is really good. Oh wait, you can't.

    Homeless

    One day I was walking next to a home less man and he was eating grass I asked him if he was hungry he said yes I said follow me you should of seen his face when I showed him my back yard ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

    Michael Jackson

    Michael Jackson and Jeffrey Epstein walk into a bar. But a few minutes later, they would walk out, because you have to be 21+. No room for those two.

    I got fired from my paramedic job on the first day. I told an eight-year-old who lost his leg in a car accident to "walk it off."

    What's the difference between a priest and Woody from Toy Story?

    Woody goes limp when a kid walks in the room.

    ๐ŸŽต BEAVER BEAVER ๐ŸŽต

    LUBA LUBA LUBA LUBA LUBA LUBA

    I'm walking down the street with a bag of dildos, beryllium, and a butt plug.

    There was a boy who owned a dog, who was walking while wearing headphones.

    Upon entering a park, he saw a sign that read, "DOGS MUST HAVE LEAD". He continued into the park, and became immersed in the music.

    After leaving the park 20 minutes later and turning around for the first time in a while to remove the lead, the sight of his now-dead, freshly-poisoned dog reminded him of the importance of heteronyms.