Vs jokes
Never break someone's heart, they only have one. Break their bones instead, they have 206 of them.
What's the difference between Batman and Robin?
Batman can go to the store without robbin'.
What's the difference between a prostitute and a drug dealer?
The prostitute can wash her crack and sell it again.
Yo mama is so fat that Thanos had to snap his fingers twice to get her out of existence.
What is the difference between 9/11 and a cow?
You stop milking a cow after 15 years.
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple?
One gets picked, and the other doesn't.
What’s the difference between Pikachu and an orphan?
Pikachu, I choose you!
Q: What is the difference between Austin Matthews and a priest?
A: One looks like a pedophile and one is a pedophile.
Q. What's the difference between Trump and a piece of shit? A. Shit isn't orange.
What’s the difference between a cat and a frog?
A cat has nine lives, and a frog croaks every day.
What's the difference between a feminist and a pencil?
One of them has a POINT:)
What's the difference between a tornado and a divorce down south?
Nothing. Someone's losing a trailer.
What's the difference between cancer and me?
My dad didn't beat cancer... Whelp, I guess I stole that one.
The only difference between my grandma and the twin towers is that they collapsed faster than my grandma.
What is the difference between an orphan and Pokemon?
People choose Pokemon.
Obesity kills thousands of times more Americans than shooting does, which teaches us an important lesson:
Shooters do poorly given the size of their targets.
Someone walks up to his dad and says, "Dad, what’s the difference between potentiality and reality?" Soo ok, the dad says to the son, "Go ask your mother, sister, and your brother if they’d sleep with the postman for $1,000,000." So the son comes back 5 minutes later and said, "Dad, they all said they would sleep with the postman." So, son, potentially, we have a million dollars, but in reality, we have two sluts and a gay one."
What is the difference between giving money to a prostitute and giving money to a church? A prostitute won't tell you that it is more blessed to give than it is to receive.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
What's the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb?
You can unscrew a light bulb.