Vs jokes
Which one fell first, the Emo Kid or the apple?
The apple, because the rope caught the kid.
What do an Apple company and an orphanage have that are different?
Apples actually get picked... Unlike little Timmy here... He's been here for 16 years.
What’s the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
What's the difference between an orange?
A hippopotamus riding a four-door motorcycle.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
An apple gets picked.
The only difference between my grandma and the twin towers is that they collapsed faster than my grandma.
Why is Viagra just like Disneyland?
It's a 1 hour wait for a 5 minute ride.
What’s the difference between an apple and an orphan? The apple has a family tree.
What's the difference between a gay man and a hairline?
The hairline is way straighter.
What's the difference between economy and Vietnamese?
Economy doesn't work.
What’s the difference between a snowMAN and a snowWOMAN?
THE SNOWBALLS!
What's the difference between the Twin Towers and a cow?
You can't milk the same cow for 15 years.
What is the difference between Twitter and this website?
There's no difference.
What's the difference between a gay man and a hairline?
The hairline is way straighter.
People go to places to see Harry Potter live, but you can just go to the abortion place and see something disappear.
What's the difference between cotton and an orphan?
Cotton gets picked.
Me vs. the emo kid: we go to high-five a tree. I get a high five; the emo kid is left hanging.
What’s the difference between 9/11 and a cow?
You can’t milk a cow for 15 years.
Why is it so hard to choose between buying a Subaru or a Volvo? Because you’re deciding whether you want to look like a rapist or a pedophile.
The 9/11 and the Spanish flu are kind of similar.
The Spanish flu was a very dangerous flu, and in 9/11, something very dangerous flew.