Violence

Violence jokes

Rape

98 views ·

A lady runs into a police station and yells, "Help, help! I've been graped!"

A police officer says, "Do you mean raped?"

The girl then replies, "No, there was a bunch of 'em!"

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  • Grenade launcher

    49 views ·

    Commander: "Fire a warning shot."

    Soldier: "Sir, this is a M32 grenade launcher."

    Commander: "Potato, potato, just fire."

    Soldier: *fires M32 grenade launcher near a pre-school*

    Commander: "They're trying to run, TAKE THEM DOWN!"

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  • Glock

    20 views ·

    When you're sitting in class and the quiet kid yells, "Lovely day, isn't it?" ... and you see a Glock shape in his pocket.

    Sally

    6 views ·

    Where did Sally go when the bomb went off?

    Everywhere.

    Why did Sally fall off the swing?

    She had no arms.

    Knock, knock.

    Who's there?

    Not Sally.

    Eye

    66 views ·

    What can you give a white person that you can't give to a black person?

    A black eye.

    Rape

    73 views ·

    What's worse than getting raped in a cemetery? Finding someone else's semen in your mom's corpse.

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  • Baby

    1 view ·

    What's worse than a pile of dead babies?

    One at the bottom that's still alive.

    What's worse than that?

    It's forced to eat its way out.

    What's even worse than that?

    It comes back for seconds.

  • 0
  • Hunter

    38 views ·

    Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He’s not breathing and his eyes are glazed.

    The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls 911.

    “I think my friend is dead!” he yells. “What can I do?”

    The operator says, “Calm down. First, let’s make sure he’s dead.”

    There’s a silence, then a shot. Back on the phone, the guy says, “OK, now what?”

    Baby

    2 views ·

    Why do you put a baby in a blender feet first?

    So you can watch the expression on their face.

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