Violence

Violence Jokes

Feminist

What’s the difference between a suicide bomber and a feminist? A suicide bomber actually does something when triggered.

Dead Baby

What's worse than a dead baby?

A pile of dead babies.

What's worse than that?

The baby at the bottom of the pile is still alive.

What's worse than that?

The baby at the bottom of pile is eating its way out.

Orphan

How to make an orphan BLEED?

Step 1 - Tell them to clap until they actually have a loving family.

Step 2 - LAUGH EVILLY as they BLEED.

Step 3 - Tell them to kys.

Step 4 - Leave that mental asylum.

Jesus Christ

You've probably heard this one before, but screw it.

What's the difference between Jesus Christ and the kid I just killed?

Jesus Christ probably died a virgin.

Orphan

joe: Are your mom and dad nice?

zozo: Well, they were until I murdered them over a bottle of Pringles.

joe: Oh, so you are an orphan and a murderer.

Girlfriend

I will never forget my girlfriend's last words... "Get off of me! STOP!" *slurp*... Dead.

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  • Pigeon

    Did you know pigeons die after sex?

    Well, at least the one I fucked did.

    Rape

    Why do so many people get charged with rape? Because they are too stupid to finish her off and bury the body.

    Rape

    If I were alone on an island with Camilla Cabello, and we were never going to escape, I'd rape her. I mean, what is she going to do? Tell someone?

    Shooting Range

    What's the difference between an American school and a shooting range?

    My dick doesn't get hard at the shooting range.

    Stab

    "And then I said, \"Knife to meet you.\""

    "You stabbed my brother!"

    "It's okay, I'm in stable condition!"

    Man

    As a murderer, I stabbed a man after infiltrating his house. His wife came in and saw me. She fell into tears. I got up and said, "Drama queen!"