Violence jokes
What's the smartest crime?
3rd degree murder.
my therapist says with time all wounds can heal.
So I stabbed him. Now we wait.
Me: brags about my 30 kill streak.
The jury: O.o
The school shooter: "I finally found you worthless crybabies!!"
The Quiet Kid: "How are a bag of chips and a mac11 the same?"
The school shooter: "I don't know."
The Quiet kid: "When you pull them out everybody wants to be your friend."
How do you make an adopted kid bleed? ... Tell him to clap until his parents come back.
Crispy, Juicy, Tender, I just put my new-born son in a blender.
What's better than seeing a baby swing around on a clothesline at 60km/h? Stopping it with a cricket bat.
Sonic says: "If you're bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?"
How do you get 500 dead babies into a car?
A blender.
How do you get 500 dead babies out of a car?
A straw.
What's a child abuser's favorite song?
"Just Beat It!"
There is one rapist among us.
When the school shooter gets killed and everyone is cheering, but you walk toward his gun; "I will finish what you started."
Me running after slapping the emo kid's wrist and saying, "I like ya cut g."
How do you create the world's quickest human pyramid?
Turn on the gas chamber.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Well, it depends on how hard you throw them.
If you ever get mad, just hit an orphan.
What are they gonna do, tell their parents?
Where is the cheapest gun range? Your local public school.
I saw a guy raping a girl in the park, so I decided to help. She didn't stand a chance against the two of us.
What's the difference between life and a rape joke?
Life fucks you until you stop breathing, a rape joke fucks you until it's not funny anymore.
What goes 200 mph and is red?
Babies in a blender.