Violence jokes
"My love, I missed you."
"Aww, I missed you too."
"I did not miss *that* time!"
Bully: Ur momma so fat that the whales said we are family even though you are a little bigger than us.
Nerd: Yo momma so ugly that when she went in the bathtub, the water jumped out.
Silence...................punch!
"Daveon, stop screaming for help because I broke your kneecaps!"
Bligitty blot, bliggity blit,
You better not be talkin' shit. 🔫
What kind of punch do little kids give to other little kids? The Sandy Hook.
Why did the clown fall off his bike?
Because the neighbor threw a washing machine at him.
What has two butts and kills people?
An assassin.
Why did the woman get raped in the ass?
She assed for it.
There once was a boy named Sammy who loved this girl beyond belief. Her name was Rayne, but she didn’t notice him and or talk to him, but one day she did and they ended up liking each other and getting married and living happily... wait, no, that’s not right.
Sammy actually snuck into Rayne’s house one day and kidnapped her and locked her in his basement and made her into a puppet so he could keep her forever and ever. The End.
If Germany is the father land, and Russia is the mother land, would WWII just be domestic violence?
Why don't parents get school shooting jokes? They're aimed at a younger audience.
"I will kill you with knife and gun, get ready, Explain Bear, stupid f***."
What do a baby and a grenade have in common? They both make loud noises when thrown.
My wife asked me to connect more on my feminine side. So I crashed our car and fucked my trainer.
Roses are red, my name is Dan...
TDM, I have a gun, GET IN THE VAN!
What is it called when you whoop a donkey?
A whooped ass and apparently some people get that everyday from their drunk dads.
After the drive-by, Tupac became known as Pewpac.
What do you call a serial killer that only kills fat people?
A mass murderer.
When you kill people in a war, it's perfectly fine, but when it's a school, everyone has a problem with it, wth.
The doctor said I had two years to live, so I shot him. The warden gave me 50. Problem solved!