What do you call a united cow?
United Steaks.
Your hairline is so far back that the united states got a front row seat
A TikTok I saw: "I'm in Canada, I'm in the United States!" Most people: "I'm in South Korea, I'm in Nor- *boom*" Me: "I'm in Palestine, I'm in Is... this heaven?"
*Insert me starting a war in the comments*
How to improve my beloved Penchester United in 5 easy steps:
1. Sell Casemeiro 🤑 2. Sell Pernandes 🤑 3. Sell Bencho 🤑 4. Sell Trashford 🤑 5. Terminate penaldo 🤑 6. Make Mctominay extend his deal 📝
These came down deep from my heart don’t let me down again, please.
Official Dj Penaldo playlist. 1. I'm a fraud 2. I need you (ft. Tap-ins) 3. I Want to Leave Mid United 4. Back where I belong (ft. Europa league) 5. TY Eder 6. Nobody wants me ( Rejectnaldo Remix) 7. Fuck that kid ( ft. Lil Broke phone) 8. Sewy (Benched +arms crossed version)
What is a Manchester United fan’s favourite TV channel? The History Channel.
Why does the United States have such a good military? Because they learn to dodge bullets in school.
Without Ronaldo, United would have been: - Eliminated from the UCL in groups😠 - 13th in the league😱
Without Messi, PSG would have been: - Still 1st in the league💀 - Better chance at beating RM in the UCL 👻
Who's supposed to be the goat??
What is the difference between the President of Ukraine and the President of the United States?
The President of Ukraine is a comedian, and the President of the United States is a joke!
Canada United States Mexico
C U M
Why was Liverpool better than man united we won 5-0 and u have a sex affender on ur teem
Listen, Man United might not thank me but get the contract out, put it on the table. Let him sign it, let him write whatever numbers he wants to put on there, given what he's done since he's come in. Ole's at the wheel, man. He's doing it. He's doing his thing. Man United are BACK.
What do you call the United States of America under a Joe Biden presidency? Answer: The Democratic People’s Socialist States of America. We're still America, just a different kind of America. And that’s no joke. 😔
“Our all-transgender brigade has suffered heavy casualties!” “What? We haven’t even sent them to fight!” “They’ve already lost 30% of the unit!”
Their are three states you don't mess with when trying to take over the United States:
Alaska because they have three times more guns than people because of the bears.
Texas because, well, it's Texas. Where else have all of the guns been going?
Lastly, Florida. Florida is the absolute definition of Trigger Happy Redneck.
How did United States become a country? It broke all of its states
My doctor said I could have up to 20 units a week. But now I've eaten half of my kitchen.
Why does g-unit and c-unit stands for ?gorilla unit and chimpanzee unit
yo forehead is so big it couldnt even fit in the united states
How do you find out about the accomplishments of the former president of the united states James Earl Carter? read the label on the jar of skippy peanut butter
