Yo mama so fat that when she tried to get on the train it said weight limit passed everyone get off
in the hospital i saw a girl with cancer trying to sleep the icu was going beep beep beep i think thats why she cant sleep so I turned it of shes asleep forever now nighty night
Subway trying to commemorate 9/11: CRASH INTO SUBWAY THIS SUBTEMBER 11TH TO GET 2 FOOTLONG SUBS FOR ONLY $9.11, THATS 2 FOOTLONG SUBS FOR $9.11 AND WATCH THEM FALL... INTO YOUR MOUTH
I just saw people writing Zoophile, Ailurophile, Dendrophilia in their bio, I thought this is cool but when I wrote Necrophile and Pedophile, Idk why people started hating me as I did something wrong, I was just trying to be cool as them man
Husband:can we try anal tonight Wife: fuck that shit Husband:that's the spirit
I tried to eat ass once the donkeys got one hell of a kick!
Why did the duck get arrested
He tried to quack a safe
What happens when a depressed kid try’s to high-five a tree
The tree leaves them hanging
Hey~ How ya doin'?~ Well I'm doin' just fine~ I lied~ I'm DEAD inside~ Don't~ Tell me 'it's gonna be alright'~ I've tried, but I can't fight like this~ Hey how ya doin', I'm tired but I'm trying to fight~
once, I tried to say, "ps. pp. that's funny right there". instead, I said, you guessed it, "penis!
What do you say when you wake up to the police trying to arrest you? “Cmon, did ya really think I’d resist a-rest?”
I tried out some puns to make people laugh, but no pun in ten did.
I tried to find a camouflage shirt but I couldn’t find one
*An obese depressed mother is trying to tie a noose but can't reach it so she calls her son for help* *a few minutes later* son: there mother: where did you learn to tie such a good noose? son: dad showed me before he died mother: DAM HIM TO HE- *slips and noose chokes her to death*
There was a blonde, a redhead, and a brunette. They were all trapped on an island and the nearest shore was 50 miles away. The redhead swam trying to make it to the other shore, she swam 15 miles, drowned, and died. The brunette swam 24 miles, drowned, and died. The blonde swam 25 miles, got tired, and swam back.
Have you ever tried Ethiopian food?
Because i know they haven't.
Yo momma so fat she tried to eat a pie chart.
Have you ever tried anal bleaching?
It really helps assholes lighten up.
why did the emo kid try high five the tree
so it can hang him
