The 400+ Best Try Jokes

Would you like to try African food??

They would too.

a blond, a red head, and brunette, were stuck on an island, and the closest populated island was 100km away, so in turn they try to swim to the island, the brunette swims 10 km then drowns, the red head swims 30 km then drowns, the blond swims 50 km then gets tired so she swims back.

Can't wait to meet you! So join the Depression family! We open real soon! Try best to hold onto sanity!

Women are like blackjack. I’m trying for 21, but I always hit on 14.

What did the kid with no arms get for Christmas? A pair of gloves! Nah, I’m not that mean, he’s still trying to open his presents.

Lil Timmy and Lil Susie are taking a bath together. Lil Susie looks down and says, "hey what's that?" Lil Timmy looks down and says, "oh that, that's only my little red race car." They continue on with their bath.

Then Lil Timmy looks down and says, "hey what's that?" Lil Susie looks down and says, "oh that, that's only my little red race car garage." They continue with their bath. Then Lil Susie says, "hey, what if we try to put your little red race car in my little red race car garage."

The parents downstairs then hear a bloody scream. They rush upstairs and then say, "what's wrong?" Lil Susie says, "well Lil Timmy tried to put his little red race car in my little red race car garage but the back wheels wouldn't fit so we cut them off."

Yesterday my daughter was playing in the garden when i saw her kill a butterfly. I told her that as a punishment, she won't eat butter for 1 month. Today i saw her killing a cockroach in the kitchen. I told her "nice try".

A cop stopped a guy for speeding.

He said, "Do you know how fast you were going?"

"I was trying to keep up with traffic," the guy replied.

The cop said, "But there is no traffic."

And the guy answered, "That's how far behind I am."

Q: How do you know when an Asian broke into your house?

A: Your math homework is done, your computer is upgraded, and 2 hours later he's still trying to back out of the driveway.

Why did Helen Keller burn her hands? Because she was trying to read the waffle iron.

I wasn't staring at you I was trying to figure out if that's your forehead or the moon

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

Business Interview With Depression Inside my brain...

Me: So... You're new? Depression: (I don't know who he is yet) mHMMMmmm! Me: Well what are your skills? Depression: Oh, taking control and leading... You know... Me: What are you trying out for? Depression: Oh, Vice Leader of Negative Thoughts. Me: Well we do need someone over there- for somewhat reason nobody wanted that job... Me: How did you know about us? Depression: Oh- I knew because of Anxiety, you know, we're friends! Me: Interesting... (Still has no idea about Anxiety and it's problemos) Me: Well I think you're signed up! I'll give you the job! Depression: tHaNKS :)

AND THATS HOW MY LIFE GOT DESTROYED :]

So there's this uncle of female and male twins, and his sister, the mother of the twins, is stuck trying to think of a name for the children. The uncle says "I've got an idea!", and the mother gets excited, thinking this could be it. She says "What should their names be?" The uncle replies "Well for your daughter, Denise" "That's a nice name" comments the mother, "but what about my son?" The uncle simply replies "Denephew".