Tree jokes
What did the hurricane say to the coconut tree?
Hold on to your nuts, this ain't no ordinary blow job!
Tuesday, I was looking at my family tree, and two dogs were using it.
If a tree could be any animal, what would it be?
Answer: A dog because of its bark lol. 😀
Why did the emo kids stop going to their favorite tree?
It died before them.
Your mama so fat, it took all the trees to build her a coffin.
How many people fit in a tree?
I don't know, you tell me.
My friend is an amazing hacker. He cut down 23 trees already.
If Donald Trump had sex with an orange, guess what his son would be?
An orange tree! :>
I speak for the trees.
*Trees whisper in my ear*
They said six million wasn't enough.
What's terrible? Three dead babies nailed to one tree.
What's worse than that? One dead baby nailed to three trees.
Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?
He was dead.
Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree?
He was also dead.
Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree?
Monkey see, monkey do.
Why did the fourth monkey fall out of the tree?
He was stapled to the first one.
Curry hits 3s, and Kobe hit 3 trees.
Why did Helen Keller have no ornaments on her Christmas tree?
'Cause she always dropped them.
Well, tell her that Halloween is the best holiday because you can hide Easter eggs under the Christmas tree while eating a big Thanksgiving turkey.
What do Christmas decorations and dead people have in common?
They both hang from a tree!
What do a priest and Christmas tree lights have in common?
They can both flash.
Why did the emo kid hate the tree?
It left him hanging.
Once, an orphan purposely fell out of a tree. He forgot his parents wouldn't catch him.
What's tree + tree?
Sticks! (Three + three = six)
His new music video has been leaked. It’s called “Living in a Tree.”