Travel jokes

A man says, "I'm flying!" He realizes he was pushed out of a plane.

We don't got sluts in the South, we got NATS: Nasty Ass Traveling Sluts.

One day I was very happy. I managed to win the lottery and receive a free vacation trip to Saudi Arabia!

Everything was going well until suddenly the FRAUD appeared! It was him, PRISTIANO PENALDO! He dived toward me and grabbed my lottery ticket. I asked him why he is doing this, only for him to reply "I need trip to Saudi Arabia to statpad the PENS!" as he dived back through my window.

Shame on you for stealing my vacation and ruining my day! You are no longer my Idol Pristianooooo!

A Muslim enters a building...

Along with 500 passengers and an airplane.

My dad is Al-Qaeda, and he even took a plane trip to New York in 2001.

I wanna be the very best, like no one ever was.

To bitch them is my real test, to train them is my cause.

I will travel across the land, searching far and wide.

Fuse Pokemon to UnderStand, the power that’s inside.

Poke him on! Gotta train them all it’s Fru and me, All I know is my dress tiny, Poke him on! Yeah, you’re my best friend, In a world you must defend, Poke him on! Gotta train them all my shirts so true, My outrage will flush us through. You bitch me and I ditch you, P-O-K-E-M-O-N!!! Gotta train them all, Gotta train them all! Pokemon!

Roses are red.

Your passports are blue.

Now go stand over there,

In that very long queue!

Son: Why is my sister’s name Paris?

Dad: Because we conceived her in Paris.

Son: Thanks, Dad.

Dad: No problem, Quarantine.

I'm a pilot and my boss told me to fly people to New York, so I flew them to New York and hit the towers. That was a tragic story.

Give a man a plane ticket, and he’ll fly for a day.

Push a man from a plane, and he’ll fly for the rest of his life.

When does the slowest person go as fast as a train?

When he is on the train.

I would tell you a time travel joke, but you did not like it.

Everyone, if I am not online, that is because I am on a vacation, so yeah.

Why did the nose cross the road to find the person who "nose"?

Stephen Hawking's not dead, he is just in airplane mode.

Wanna go to suicide school, then time travel to Hitler's bunker and ask him to teach you?

My wife is mad that I have no sense of direction. So I packed up my stuff and went right.

When my dad once went to the Virgin Islands, now it's just called the Islands.

So my friend and I went camping at a Cold Lake Campground and he jumped into it without any warning, and so I asked him, "Wat-er you doing?"

What's the difference between China and New York City?

In China, the Asians ride ON the trains. In New York City, they usually end up riding UNDER them.