Transportation jokes

Why did Sally cross the road?

She didn’t wear her seatbelt.

Today was a really bad day. My mother-in-law was hit by a cab AND I lost my job as a cab driver!

What's the difference between a Lambo and a pile of dead babies?

I don't have a Lambo in my garage.

I took an Uber home the other day, and the bastard was swerving all over the road and driving on the shoulder... I said, "Who the f*ck taught you to drive?" To this, he replied, "Stevie Wonder."

What is yellow and can't swim?

A school bus full of kids.

What is the difference between 100 dead babies and a Mustang Challenger?

I don't have a Mustang Challenger in my garage.

What brands do people in wheelchairs wear?

Michelin.

Everyone always has a special person in their life someday, but I think yours got ran over by a bus.

Were you born on the highway? That's where most accidents happen.

What did the bomber say to the jet?

"Sorry bro, I gotta bomb."

*WAIT NO-*

What did the cat say when he took his new car for a test drive?

"Meoooow!"

Today was the worst day ever. My ex got ran over by a bus, and I lost my job as a bus driver.

To people who say that depression hits hard...

The car begs to disagree.

All trucks are monster trucks if you’re afraid of trucks.

A llama kicked me out of my house. Alpaca my bags.

haha why couldn't the bike stand up because it was too tired.

Quit making plane jokes. They're just plane wrong.

Why did the blonde stare at the Ford?

Because it said, "Focus."

I was at a train station and a woman ran up to me and asked, "Is this train running on time?" I said, "No, it runs on steam and coal."

Why did the frog take the train to work? His car got toad.