Transportation jokes
Me: Opens the window to get some fresh air.
Everyone else on the plane: 😟...😱
A pedo is driving down a highway really slowly and gets stopped by the police. The officer asks why he was driving so slowly. The man answers, "I don't wake up the kids."
What did the airplane say to the paper plane? Why do you look like a wimp?
People can say whatever they want about pedophiles. At least they are pursuing their dreams.
In a white van.
Has anybody heard of the guy who passed out in the middle of oncoming traffic? Yeah, he was tired.
Today was a bad day. First, my ex got hit by a bus. Then I lost my job as a bus driver.
Me: What's yellow and can't swim?
My sister: What??
Me: A school bus filled with kids.
What do you call a flying octopus?
An octocopter! 🚁
What is yellow and can’t fly?
A school bus.
Stephen Hawking got an engine swap with a Nissan 350Z, and they said his wheelchair wasn't street legal :/
What did the bus say to the mail?
Dog.
What kind of bus is yellow? A school bus driver.
Why do ghosts love elevators? They lift their spirits!
Why did the chicken cross the road?
TO GET TO THE OTHER SIIIIDE!!!
My dog kept chasing people on a bike. Eventually, it got so bad I had to take his bike away.
What do you call a man who lost his car??
Carlos
Why did the dog cross the road?
To get to the other side.
What did the Ford Mustang say to the crowd of innocent people?
I'D HIT THAT!
I remember Grandpa's last words, "Oh, shit! It's in drive!"
One day a truck driver had a truck full of squirrels. A police officer said, "Sir, I'm going to need you to take these squirrels to the zoo." The driver did so and left. The next day the driver was back, but this time the squirrels were wearing sunglasses. The officer said, "I thought I told you to take these squirrels to the zoo." The driver said, "I did. Today I'm taking them to the beach."