Why did the chicken cross the road?
I don’t know.
To get to the idiot house.
Knock, knock. Who's there?
The chicken.
Transportation Jokes
Why did the chicken want to cross the road? Because he was suicidal and wanted to get hit by a car.
"Why did Susie fall off the swing?" "Because she had no arms."
"Why couldn’t she get up off the ground?" "Because she had no friends."
"Knock knock." "Who’s there?" "Not Susie, she’s still on the ground."
"Where did Susie go when the bomb went off?" "Everywhere."
"Why couldn’t Susie scratch her leg?" "Because it was in a different body bag."
"Why did Susie drop her ice cream?" "She was hit by a bus."
"Why did Susie fall off the swing?" "Someone threw a refrigerator at her."
Why did the camel cross the road?
Because it wanted to get to the bright green grass.
Why didn't the chicken cross the road?
He got hit!
Why did the dead baby cross the road?
It was strapped to the chicken.
Why didn’t the bike stand on its own?
It was too tired.
Q: Where did Sally go on her bike? A: Nowhere.
Why do you pay cash for the metro train in Newcastle upon Tyne?
Q: What do you call a Mexican man that lost his car?
A: Carlos.
What do we want? Plane noises!
When do we need it? Neeooooooowwwww!
A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel on his pants, a peg leg, and a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender says, "Hey, you’ve got a steering wheel on your pants."
The pirate says, "Arrrr, I know. It’s driving me nuts."
What's the difference between a homeless person and a car?
Only one gets fuel.
A guy bought an AMG and crashed it. Now he knows how the Mercedes bends.
A guy crashed his Ford SUV. He couldn't escape.
Plane versus plane. Who wins? Plane.
Q: Why did the vegetable cross the road?
A: 'Cause someone let go of the handle bars.
Pinto?
What's black, long and full of seamen?
A submarine.
I love escalator jokes. There's not too many steps.
