Transportation jokes
Once there was a boat. Its friends said,
"It's time to come back." And the boat said,
"No way. I don't give into pier pressure."
What's the difference between a Lambo and 100 dead babies?
I don't have a Lambo in my garage.
You were born on the freeway, you know why?
Because that's where a lot of accidents happen. 😈
Why did the bike fall over?
'Cause it was wheely tired.
Why did Billy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus.
Tiresome is the quantification of tire.
Why did the snail paint a big "S" on his car?
Because he wanted people to say look at that S-car go when he rolled by.
Why couldn’t the bike stand up?
Because it was “two tired”!
What’s the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Lamborghini?
I don’t have a Lamborghini in my garage.
How do fish get to school?
By the octobus.
Why does the Norway navy have barcodes on the sides of their ships?
So when they return to port, they can Scandinavian.
What's the difference between a dirty bus stop and a lobster with boobs?
One's a crusty bus station and one's a busty crustacean.
Why did Sally drop her ice cream cone?
Because she got hit by a bus.
How do you get 100 babies in the back of a pick up truck? Blender.
How do you get them back out? Straw.
What has four wheels and flies?
A garbage truck.
How do you spell racecar backwards?
racecar
How do you spell racecar sideways?
Paul Walker's death.
I took an Uber home the other day, and the bastard was swerving all over the road and driving on the shoulder... I said, "Who the f*ck taught you to drive?" To this, he replied, "Stevie Wonder."
What do you call a plane with no wings?
Sally.
What's the difference between a car and a pile of dead babies?
I don't have a car in my garage.
What do you call Stephen Hawking on fire?
Hot Wheels.