Training jokes
Why can you rub a dog's nose in their pee when they go on the carpet but when I do the same to an Alzheimer's patient I get fired from the nursing home?
How does a train eat?
"Chew chew!"
What will Sarah Thompson (Ninja Steel Pink) do if she meets the ToQgers (Train Super Sentai)?
They will TRAIN together.
Why is it so hard to tame a dog?
Because it's unTRAINable!
If Fascism got popularized by autistics, the trains would have run on time.
What’s a rapper’s favorite exercise?
Heavy bars.
Why was the train late?
It kept getting sidetracked.
The cure for depression is around the corner... There it is, the train.
My favorite joke was: what's the difference between a teacher and a train?
What is the difference between your new teacher and a train?
Your teacher says, "Spit out your gum," but a train says, "Choo Choo!"
Nostalgia hits you like a train.
It's so hard, you can even wake up.
When does the slowest person go as fast as a train?
When he is on the train.
My Son: "Mummy, why is my name Thomas?"
Me: "Because the night you were conceived, I had a train run on me."
Which train is loaded with bubble gum?
A chew-chew train.
Your mother is responsible for all the train drivers that are never ever late. She taught them all to pull out on time.
What's America's no. 1 class?
Target practice.
Yo mama so fat that when she tried to get on the train, it said, "Weight limit passed, everyone get off!"
Chuck Norris trained Dude Perfect how to do it.
The last thing I said to my dog was,
"Play dead."
I was at a train station and a woman ran up to me and asked, "Is this train running on time?" I said, "No, it runs on steam and coal."
On Paxomedy channel, I made a video of a Rooster and a dog fighting.
I needed to know why they were fighting. Once I dug down into the issue, it turned out that the Dog called the Rooster a Cock, and the Rooster laughed and called the Dog a useless Bitch, and that was the beginning of their fight, and weird enough, the Cock won!
I went to congratulate the winner, but he thought he was insulting me by calling me Zinjathropus, but I said that was a compliment because Zinja was an old skeleton found in Africa, and I am African. I said to the Rooster he shouldn't have fought with the dog just because he called him a Cock. He said that being called a Cock is a compliment, and the fighting was his exercise to toughen up for serious fights with Dogs!