Training jokes

Why do rappers love the gym?

'Cause they're all about them heavy bars.

Them: What's on your arm?

Me: I'm training to breathe fire ;)

Are you a ghost train? Because I am going to scream when I ride you.

Why did the man go across the train tracks to get to the other side?

The last thing I said to my dog was,

"Play dead."

Why does the Jedi never join the dark side?

If they did, then they would lose the opportunity to molest young padawans.

Which train is loaded with bubble gum?

A chew-chew train.

One time there was a depressed man standing in the middle of a train track. A girl said, "Excuse me, can you move, please? I'm trying-" Then the man stopped her sentence and said, "How is your t-shirt so clean?" Then she said back, "Easy, hung it up."

I asked my mum to be in the Paralympics, and she said I had to eat more vegetables.

What is the difference between an ISIS training camp and a school?

Don't ask me, I just fly the drone.

Yo mama so fat that when she tried to get on the train, it said, "Weight limit passed, everyone get off!"

I need a hug.

*hugs train*

Yo mama is like train tracks; she gets laid all around the country.

Why did the cloud apply to stormtrooper training school?

He mist.

A friend of mine told me this joke a long time ago and I have never forgotten it.

A worm was crawling over a train track, and a train ran over him and cut off his ass. The worm turned around to get the piece of his ass back and another train ran over him and cut off his head.

BAD IDEA and a lesson to us all.

NEVER LOSE YOUR HEAD OVER A PIECE OF ASS!! LMAO (literally, kind of)( pretty sure you get it)

School is a lot like boot camp. The only difference is that you don't have to get deployed to get shot at.

Are suicide bombers taught properly how to fly, or...

Are they just given a quick crash course?

Are you a train? Because I want you to run over me. :)

I wanna be the very best, like no one ever was.

To bitch them is my real test, to train them is my cause.

I will travel across the land, searching far and wide.

Fuse Pokemon to UnderStand, the power that’s inside.

Poke him on! Gotta train them all it’s Fru and me, All I know is my dress tiny, Poke him on! Yeah, you’re my best friend, In a world you must defend, Poke him on! Gotta train them all my shirts so true, My outrage will flush us through. You bitch me and I ditch you, P-O-K-E-M-O-N!!! Gotta train them all, Gotta train them all! Pokemon!

What is the difference between your new teacher and a train?

Your teacher says, "Spit out your gum," but a train says, "Choo Choo!"