What did Amtrak say at the Olympics I AM keeping Trak
What do you call a not potty trained human?
Amber Heard
I was spending my holiday in Paris with my gf. As we were walking near the city, a meteor hit and killed my gf. Forensics did an autopsy on the corpse and concluded that someone missed a pen and hit my gf from the psg training ground. SHAME ON YOU PESSI FOR RUINING MY LIFE🤬😡
Say what you want about Hitler at least he got the trains to run on time
Ex Of Johnnys: I have a question. Johnny:What? Ex Of Johnnys: Am I pretty? Johnny: Yes ofc jesus mad everbody wonderfully! Ex: Awhh! Johnny: But who ever made you was painting tomas the train while making your face.
What's the difference between China and New York City?
In China, the Asians ride ON the trains. In New York City, they usually end up riding UNDER them.
How does a train eat?
Chew chew!
What's white, yellow and goes 40 mph?
A train driver's egg sandwich
How does a train dance?It bogies!🚂🚃🚃🚃🚃🚃🚃🚃🚃😂😂
What the slowest train in the world?A slowcoach!🚂🚃🚃🚃🚃🚃🚃🚃🚃
What does a school bus crash and a train crash have in common?
They always line up.
A train walks into a bar. It says to the barkeeper, "I'll have a gallon of ale." "A gallon?" the barkeeper asks. "Yes," replies the train, "I always end up chugging it."
Your mum is so fat i had to take 2 buses and a train toget to her good side.
hey look its that TRAINS gender guy he says i like trains uh o
i like trains *train hits him*
A friend of mine told me this joke a long time ago and I never forgotten it... A worm was crawling over a train track, and a train ran over him and cut off his ass...the worm turned around to get the piece of his ass back & another train ran over him and cut off his head... BAD IDEA & a lesson to us all... NEVER LOSE YOUR HEAD OVER A PIECE OF ASS!! LMAO (literally, kind of)( pretty sure you get it)
I've sadly received a rejection letter from NASA. Strangely, it says there's no space on their training program.
I had an uncle who was a conductor. He wasn’t a symphony conductor, nor was he a street car conductor, nor was he a train conductor. He was struck by lightning.
I need a hug
*hugs train*
Heres a Song That Describes My Old Life-By-watersharky Productions- My buddies think I'm on the lake Boss thinks I've been sick for days And mama's probably on her way 'Cause I ain't picked up the phone I've been a million places But they're all up in my head Over-drinking, overthinking ever since you left I've been gone, I've been gone I've been sittin' on the couch watching TV all day long All day long, I've been tryin' to figure out how a good thing went wrong Faster than that freight train, farther than that airplane Sadder than a country song Headed down that highway, anywhere but my way Ever since you moved on, I've been gone Took a trip down memory lane Checked into hotel heartbreak Passed rock bottom on the way Without leaving my living room I've been a million places But they're all up in my head Over-drinking, overthinking ever since you left I've been gone, I've been gone I've been sittin' on the couch watching TV all day long All day long, I've been tryin' to figure out how a good thing went wrong Faster than that freight train, farther than that airplane Sadder than a country song Headed down that highway, anywhere but my way Ever since you moved on, I've been gone Yeah I've been gone All the clothes are on the floor All the mail's by the door All the whiskey bottles in my bed All the dishes in the sink All the gas is in the tank All the neighbors probably think I'm dead I've been gone, I've been gone I've been sittin' on the couch watching TV all day long All day long, I've been tryin' to figure out how a good thing went wrong Faster than that freight train, farther than that airplane Sadder than a country song Headed down that highway, anywhere but my way Ever since you moved on, I've been gone (ooh, ooh) I've been gone (ooh, ooh) Gone
