Tragedy jokes

Today was the worst day ever! My brother got run over, and I lost my driver's license!

What's the difference between a million dollars and a million dead babies?

I don't have a million dollars laying around my house.

How do you spell racecar backwards?

racecar

How do you spell racecar sideways?

Paul Walker's death.

There are a lot of things that explode... like cars, boats, the Twin Towers.

My dad told me a joke one time. When I realized the joke, the second tower was hit.

What's red and spins really fast?

Kurt Cobain's ceiling fan.

George Floyd was in a TV show, Fresh Prince, with no air.

Orphan: I wish to be like Batman.

Genie: Your wish is granted.

Orphan goes home. His parents are dead.

When I was a kid, I used to read a lot. I mainly grew up reading stories by Shakespeare, especially the story Romeo & Juliet. That one in particular taught me a valuable life lesson. It taught me to not be surprised when my girlfriend killed herself.

I'm the second worst thing to happen to those orphans.

What is long, yellow and can’t swim?

A school bus full of orphans.

Mom tells her son to go to the other kid, to walk to the kid just standing still, to clap so the kid can hear and move out of the way of the car.

But her son was blind, the other kid had no legs so he couldn't walk, and the kid has no arms so he couldn't clap, and the kid died because he couldn't hear; he was deaf.

Son: Dad? Why is mommy no longer with us?

Dad: Why did the chicken cross the road?

Son: Why?

Dad: To get to the other side, but your mother only made it about halfway.

Sandy Hook is my favorite holiday.

Did you hear about Hellen Keller falling down the well?

She screamed her little fingers off.

(Best pick-up line ever). Your body is like 9/11. I wanna crash into your twin towers. 😏

I was just chilling in the World Trade Center and got airplane wifi.

One thing is for sure, the victims from 9/11 died warm.

Did you know Princess Diana had dandruff?

Yea, they found her “head and shoulders“ on the backseat of her car.

When was the biggest BBQ in history? Hiroshima, August 6, 1945.