Toy jokes
if a toy from Toy Story died, the kid wouldn't know, and the other toys would just have to watch as their kid played with the corpse.
A couple has sex in the dark every single night.
One night, the wife gets curious about what goes on, so they start f...ing, and she flicks the light on. When she flicks the light on, she catches him with a dildo playing with her pussy. She's so mad that she started ranting and raving. The husband says, "Honey, I know you're mad, and I'll explain the toy. Just do me one favor: explain the children."
Don't worry if you think your life sucks. Just remember that people are arguing over the gender of a potato head.
What's the difference between Madeline Mikan and a boomerang?
Boomerangs come back.
I threw a paralyzed kid into the fireplace and called him hotwheels.
Ever wondered why Chinese kids don’t believe in Santa?
They made the toys.
What's an orphan's favorite toy?
A boomerang because it actually comes back.
What did the orphan's friend give him for his birthday?
Lego, so he can build a home.
Why do orphans love boomerangs?
Because they come back.
My friend put an action toy and called it Kobe and put it on a drone. I realized that my friend didn't know how to fly a drone.
DAD: I'm bringing your toys to the orphanage.
SON: Why?
DAD: You're going to need them.
Why does Ama like boomerangs? Because they actually come back!
What did they do with Michael Jackson when he died?
They melted him down and turned him into Lego, so kids could play with him for once.
Why doesn't Barbie ever get pregnant? Because Ken comes in a different box!
I pushed a kid in a wheelchair into a fire today.
Now they call him Hot Wheels.
Why are sex toys something to stuff in your asshole and not a big racecar?
What is an orphan's favorite toy? A mom and dad action figure.
What do you get if you cross hot wheels, hot legs? Hehe.
Why do orphans work boomerangs?
Because it's the only thing that comes back.
Why couldn't the teddy bear finish his dessert?
He was stuffed.