Worst Jokes Ever
Obesity kills thousands of times more Americans than shooting does, which teaches us an important lesson:
Shooters do poorly given the size of their targets.
Guys, I promise I’m not suicidal, I just like dark things.
*proceeds to walk around the house with headphones in and stare at the ceiling while laying down on the couch*
What is the number one song played in Columbine High? Smells Like Teen Spirit.
What is the most common crime in Asia?
Identity fraud.
Why did the rapper become a painter?
To brush up on his rhymes!
They say there is strength in numbers. Tell that to the people in the World Trade Center.
In 2001, my parents took me to 9/11. I was soaring towards it with excitement!
Why do Mexicans take Xanax?
Because they’re Hispanic attacks.
What is the difference between runners and my car?
My car is still running.
What is red, pink, yellow, green, orange?
A black woman dressed for church.
A man goes to the doctor. Says he's depressed. Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone in a threatening world.
Doctor says: "Treatment is simple. The great clown - Pagliacci - is in town. Go see him. That should pick you up."
Man bursts into tears, says "But doctor... I am Pagliacci."
How many times does 50 fit into 9?
Get in a van and find out!
I feel bad for all American Clash Royale players.
They always start with two towers downed.
Dad: I'm giving all your toys to the orphan kid.
Kid: Why, Dad?
Dad: So you don't get bored.
Aloneness is not the joke, it's unfortunately my reality.
Is "buttcheek" one word, or should I spread them?
A priest, a rabbi, and a minister walk into a bar.
The bartender looks at them and says, “What is this – a joke?”
What can’t orphans do in baseball? Go to home.
Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? He had no balls to do it.
You can't call yourself a baby boomer if you have never detonated an infant.