Worst Jokes Ever
What’s a vegetable’s favorite dance?
The cabbage patch.
Your hairline is so long, people call it "The Natural Disaster!"
Gay gang members don't do drive-bys, they do fruit roll-ups.
Why does Miss Piggy douche with honey?
Because Kermit likes his pork sweet and sour.
What's black, white, and red all over? A nun on her period.
What is the difference between Usain Bolt and Hitler?
Usain Bolt can finish a race.
Your dad is so fat that when he walks past the TV, I miss three episodes of South Park.
There was a boy who owned a dog, who was walking while wearing headphones.
Upon entering a park, he saw a sign that read, "DOGS MUST HAVE LEAD". He continued into the park, and became immersed in the music.
After leaving the park 20 minutes later and turning around for the first time in a while to remove the lead, the sight of his now-dead, freshly-poisoned dog reminded him of the importance of heteronyms.
Why do Jews have big noses?
Because air is free...
Yo mama is so dumb, she sits on the TV and watches sofa.
Mother: "Sweetie, make a Christmas wish."
Girl: "I wish that Santa will send some clothes to those naked girls in papa's computer."
I heard Steven Spielberg is coming out with a new movie about fat people called E.C.
(Extra Cholesterol)
They say there is strength in numbers. Tell that to the people in the World Trade Center.
What do you call a black goldfish? A gigger.
USA: "Never forget 9/11."
Brits: "What happened on the 9th of November?"
Cheer for fun on the telephone and singing, "We are family!" Even then, your dad, really, he's fat, just like your dad. And your mom's fat ass, b**** ass, looking like an Oompa Loompa self, looking like an ugly.
What was the last thing to go through the minds of 9/11 jumpers?
Their ankles.
Did you hear? There is a new toy for boys ages 2-10. It's called Jackson. A tiny white doll, with black Jackson. Get it while supplies last.
How do women hold their liquor? By the ears.
I'm not saying you're annoying. But if rectal herpes were a person, it would be you.