Worst Jokes Ever
The weirdest thing happened yesterday. My dad came back from work... He’s a suicide bomber.
What's the difference between a priest and acne? At least acne waits til the boy is 12 to come on his face.
Have you ever tried eating a clock? It's really time-consuming, especially if you go for seconds.
"Would you like to play the rape game?"
"No wtf" she replied.
"That's the spirit!"
I hate how funerals are always at 9 a.m. -- I'm not really a mourning person.
How do you get four prostitutes on one chair?
You turn it upside down.
Why did Nicholas Cage and Angelina Jolie attend Paul Walker’s funeral?
He went from "The Fast and the Furious" to "Gone in 60 Seconds."
Yo momma so fat, her belt size is E for Equator.
What's worse than five dead babies in one garbage can?
- One dead baby in five garbage cans.
What did the fish get on his math test?
A sea plus.
Why did Beyonce say "to the left to the left"?
Because women don't have rights.
One time Chuck Norris peed in the gas tank of a semi truck as a practical joke. That truck is now known as Optimus Prime.
What's the difference between drugs and kids?
I don't sell drugs.
Q: How do you know when an Asian broke into your house?
A: You can't find your dog.
What’s one thing you can say at a funeral and during sex?
She was too young.
What is a reverse exorcism? It is when the Devil tries to pull a priest out of a child.
I'm so proud of my Grandpa. He killed Hitler himself.
What do you call a swimming terrorist?
A bath bomb.
My grandpa may be a pedo, but at least he slows down in the school car park.
Boy and girl playing hide and seek... girl: "I found you." Boy: "What gave me away?" Girl: "Ur parents obviously."