Worst Jokes Ever
Why can't orphans be gay? Because then they would be home-osexual.
I prank called someone saying, "SON! IT'S ME, SON! I'M COMING FOR YOU!!!" My friend next to me asked who I was calling, and I said, "the orphanage."
I saw this kid who looked depressed, so I threw a torch at him. I thought I would brighten up his day.
I did a knock knock joke to an orphan. I said, "Knock knock." He said, "Who is there?" And I said, "Not your parents."
If it’s called the “living room,” why did my grandma die there?
What did the sign on an out-of-business brothel say?
"Beat it. We're closed."
What do you call a dwarf suicide bomber?
A party popper.
What do you call a funny mountain?
Hill-arious.
When I cut vegetables for my famous stew, I don’t know why everyone in the nursing home is always looking at me.
Why can't Jesus judge gay people?
He got nailed right before he died.
Have you heard of the book about the transgender whale?
It’s called "Maybe Dick."
What does a noisy chilli do?
It gets jalapeno business.
What do you call a cow that eats grass?
A lawn mooer.
The worst thing about an owl is how they can maintain eye contact when you put them in a microwave.
What do you get when you put 2 nuns and a blond on a football field? 2 tight ends and a wide receiver.
Hitler walks into his meeting room, turns to his trusted staff, and says, “I want you to organize the execution of 10,000 Jews and one kitten.”
Everyone looks around the table and, after a long silence, Goering pipes up. “Mein Fuhrer, why do you want to kill a kitten?”
Hitler smiles and turns to the rest of the table. “You see, no one cares about the Jews.”
Your legs are just like Oreos! I wanna split the ends and eat what's in between.
She wears short skirts, I wear t-shirts, and we're both getting sent home from school because it's distracting to boys, apparently.
What looks like it has jaundice and is filled with stupidity?
A Mexican.
How do prisoners call each other? Cell phones.