Worst Jokes Ever
Did you hear about the new Pixar movie? It's about cancer patients. It's called "Finding Kemo."
So, I was laying in bed and it's winter, so my room is always cold because the heater doesn't work.
And I was thinking.... It would be warmer if someone else was laying here with me.... Then I laughed because who would wanna be with me. Hahaha
What’s the worst thing about having a sister with cancer? You can’t pull on her hair.
Why does Trump "not" wear glasses? Because he's got 20/20 vision!
Boy: Crap, I hit a deer.
Girl: Awe... I guess it’s not so much of a dear.
Boy: ...
Boy: Get the hell out!
What do U.S. airstrikes and dark humor have in common?
They're normally pointed towards Africa and the Middle East.
Once I saw a girl crying and asked, "Where are your parents?" God, I love working at orphanages.
Girl: I've been an orphan since I was three.
Boy: Knock knock.
Girl: ...Who's there?
Boy: Not your parents!
"What's your name, son?" the principal asked his student. The kid replied, "D-d-d-dav-dav-david, sir." "Do you have a stutter?" the principal asked. The student answered, "No sir, my dad has a stutter, but the guy who registered my name was a real jerk."
If Donald Trump is running against Bill Clinton, it's safe to say that we are witnessing the Lolita Express Erections...oops, I mean Elections.
I was at work yesterday and I saw this kid crying. I went up to him and asked him where his parents were, and he started to cry even more. Gosh, don't you just love working at the orphanage?
I'm shocked about Donald Trump escaping the transgender accusations. Trump is more talkative than any of the popular girls I went to school with! Not to mention Trump's tweets...
Why is vegetable soup hard to cook? Because you can't fit the wheelchair in!
What does a priest and a clown have in common?
They both make children cry.
I wasn't close to my father when he died. Which is lucky because he stepped on a landmine.
Have you ever had sex camping?
It's inTENTS.
Serial killers be like: "Blood is red, veins are blue, next one is YOU."
Mole
Why did the plane cross the sky?
To hit the Twin Towers...
Hey, I misplaced 2.1 trillion a few days ago, on September 7th, 2001.