Worst Jokes Ever
I started crying when my dad cut up onions.
Onions was such a good hamster.
If I wanted to kill myself, I would climb to the top of your ego then jump to your IQ.
A mother and son were in the backyard, and the son finished building a shed. The mother says, "You're the best husband ever."
What's a rapist's fav position?
Missionary in a dark corner.
*Watches sad movie with family*
Everyone else: *Crying*
Sister: How aren't you crying?
Me: I have no tears left to cry...
What does a killer say in the shower in the morning?
- Splish splash, I'm gonna slash...
What's the difference between sex and rape? Some effective drugs.
What's the difference between Ironman and Ironwoman? One is a superhero and the other is a simple command.
What does a perverted frog say?
"Rubbit."
What's worse than a dead baby?
A pile of dead babies.
What's worse than that?
The baby at the bottom of the pile is still alive.
What's worse than that?
The baby at the bottom of pile is eating its way out.
What do you call an orphan with a boner?
Porn.
What do you call a feminist with a rape whistle? Delusional and optimistic.
What kind of games do they play in Africa? The hunger games.
Why did the pen stop writing?
'Cause the pen wasn't very dependable.
When I was in middle school, I was on my bus and people were doin' hairline jokes, and I heard this guy say, "Your hairline goes back to... uhhhhhh... 2042?"
When you're 34, it'll be 420 months before you turn 69 years old.
Everybody loves guns!
Every time I show them mine, they give me free stuff.
I was crying because my dad was cutting onions...
Onions was a good dog.
How many times does Ariana Grande knock at the door?
She doesn’t, she just uses 7 rings.
You know why orphans can't play baseball? 'Cause they can't find home.