Worst Jokes Ever

If at first it doesn't succeed, try, try again.

Why can't Biden play chess?

Because he doesn't have the towers.

Guess what song this is from:

"I'll cut you into little bitty pieces,

Or freeze you till your blood runs cold,

Or stab your till' you heart stops pumping.

I'm here to realize your wish from what I'm told."

Saying I'm sorry and I apologize are basically the same thing... except at a funeral.

How do you fit a baby into a shoebox?

A blender.

How do you get them out?

Tortilla chips.

I thought it was polite to open the door for a lady, but she just screamed and flew out of the plane.

What do you call 2 Indians on a dating website? Connect the dots.

Why are Michael Jackson and caviar so much in common?

They both come on little white crackers.

And that concludes your French oral. You can put your trousers back up, and I'll see you on Monday.

Yo mama so fat, when she joined NASA, they put her in orbit and the next day there was a lunar eclipse.

After a long day of work, Kanye West goes to his Kanye Nest to take his Kanye Rest. He wakes up feeling his Kanye Best. Then he’ll get Kanye Dressed on his Kanye Vest to go on a Kanye Quest. He goes to church and becomes Kanye Blessed, then to a hotel room to be a Kanye Guest.

Do you know the TV show "Naked and Afraid?" Well, that's what my grandpa and I played when I was young.

what does BLM stand for?

Biden loves minors.

"Oh, waiter! Waiter!"

"Yes, sir?"

"Do you have frog's legs?"

"Why, yes."

"Good. Now hop along and get me a steak!"

My ex-girlfriend got hit by a bus. I also lost my bus driver's license.

There's something on your chin. No, not that one, the third row.

What do you call an Indian plane that comes back?

A Boomerang.

I told the judge I thought she was unconscious before she woke up crying. The judge asked: "Why didn't you drug her again so she would forget?"

You'd think the Catholic Church would be thankful for condoms, less DNA evidence.

"I hate when people make 9/11 jokes because my grandfather died during the Twin Tower attacks. He was the best pilot in Saudi Arabia."