Worst Jokes Ever
What did Pepper say to Spray?
"Hey Spray, I'm Pepper, and I think we should fight crime!"
Why did the sun go to church?
Because it needs Jesus.
Did you know toilets, while you're at work, eat your toilet paper?
What do kids with cancer and cancer jokes have in common?
CANCER!
Just kidding, they are both fun to laugh at.
Why do fat cows eat fat cows? Because I wrote this in America.
My grades.
How do you call somebody who has bought a Corona?
A Cor-owner.
Seriously, who wants dicks?
Driving on a road at night and hit a speed bump. Remember, there are no speed bumps... I hit Bambi!
The other day I lost all my crayons.
I just wish I had a shoulder to cray on.
The duck bought lipstick. When he paid, he said, "Put it on my bill."
What’s a cow with no body and no nose?
Nobody knows.
A pregnant woman enters the hospital with her concerned husband. As she goes into labor, a group of doctors asked him if he would like to try a device that transfers your spouse's pain to the father's nervous system.
He agrees and the doctors turn the dial on the device to 10%. Strangely, the man felt little pain. They continued to adjust the dial until it stopped at 100%, yet the man felt nothing. Later on, the wife had delivered the baby and the pair left the hospital with a healthy baby only to find the milkman laying on their stairs with a puddle of blood around his head, shaking uncontrollably.
Q: You have problems, I think your disease is BOOFA.
Q: What boofa?
A: Boofa deez nuts in yo mouth!
Who likes penis?
My cousin!
So there were three baby chickens and two mothers. The first baby said, "Why am I named Calf?"
And the mother said, "I f***ed a cow."
Then the second baby came up to its mother, and it said, "Why am I named B***h?"
And its mom said, "I f***ed a wolf."
And the final baby came to its mother and said, "Why am I named Orphan?" And because its mother wasn't there to see it, this is what I have to say: "Because you are one, you ducking hitch!!"
I went to the bathroom and into a stall to see a hole in the wall. It reminded me of "The Lickable Wallpaper" from "Willy Wonka and The Chocolate Factory." I jokingly started licking. Though, the carrot tasted musky and kinda wrinkly.
A skeleton walks into a bar and said it takes "backbone" to mess with me, and if you try to insult me, I have thick skin.
You’re so lame, you don’t have a superpower!
"Yah, I do!"
Oh yeah? What is it?
"My diaphragm contracts and moves downwards into my chest cavity and my lungs expand!"
That’s breathing, Jim.
"NO IT’S NOT, JACOB, YOU CAN’T PROVE IT!"
"Dick dick dick, fuck dick nugget shit."