Worst Jokes Ever

All these oranges, but you're still the one for me.

How do you turn a straight guy into a gay guy? Well... for starts, you grab that ass of his, drag him into the bathroom, and tell him to suck my long, big pineapple, and thus, you have yourself one straight guy converted into a dick-sucking machine.

What does a blowjob from an 80-year-old and bungee jumps have in common?

You feel the rush, but don't look down.

My girlfriend asked me to tell a joke. I told her to look in the mirror.

We never met again.

What did Stephen Hawking say on the stairway to heaven?

Oh, fuck! I can’t get up them.

Wyatt is a guy who still doesn't have a girlfriend because he didn't sit with Yanely and Jasmine at lunch. Funny joke, huh?

What did the chocolate dentist say to the other chocolate dentist? Did you "chip" a tooth?

A blind man is going for a walk. Eventually, he reaches a fish market.

He yells, "Hello ladies!"

If Stephen Hawking had a FIFA card, he would have 99 dribble.

The real reason Steven Hawking died is he was drunk and tried to go down a flight of stairs.

Don't trust the atoms, because they make up everything.

What do you call a pile of cats? A MEOW-tain.

I saw Stephen Hawking using an ATM. It is nice to see he had found someone before he shut down.

How do kill a redneck?

Wait until he is fucking his sister and take the brakes off his house.

How do you poop?

The Octopus joke! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.

A boy was following me for 8 years, even into the stall. I finally told him I’m not gay.

Three friends were stuck in the desert. They were struggling and trying to find food when they found a magical lamp. They rubbed it and out came a genie, and the genie says, "Each of you friends get to have one wish." So the first friend said, "I wish to go home," same as the second one. The third friend said, "I'm lonely. I wish my friends were with me!"

What do you call a person with no arms?

Armless.

If only Karen Carpenter had eaten Mama Cass's sandwich...