Worst Jokes Ever

What do you get if you do not eat? Dry.

Did you hear about the goldfish that went bankrupt?

Now he's a bronze fish.

The coach yelled at me when I stole home. I ran home with the base and asked him where to put it.

Stephen Hawking was incredible at poker, he had no tell whatsoever.

Friend: What goes up but not down?

You: Your age.

There were two snakes slithering along when one snake said to the other snake, "Are we poisonous?" "Idk why?" The other snake responded, "'Cause I just bit my tongue!"

What did the drummer call his 2 twin daughters?

Anna 1 Anna 2.

What are they going to say about Tim Gunn in 20 years?

He kicked the bucket.

Do you love water?

Then you love 75% of me.

My friend asked for something dark and creamy. I said..... "GU KHA".

Friend: Do you know him?

Other Friend: Know who?

Friend: My dick!

Say "joke" 5 times.

Oh, nothing happened.

I was trying to make a joke about fighting, but I couldn't come up with a good punchline.

What phone do orphans have?

An iPhone 10R.

Knock knock. Who's there? Daisy. Daisy who? Daisy me rollinnnnnn!

The greatest playwright in history found he couldn’t use lances. He could only use "Shake-spears."

Jnnnnnnnnnnnjjjjjjjjjooooooojjkk.

Why did the first fence hate the other fence?

The second fence used some of-fensive language.

Wanna hear a pizza joke?

Never mind, it's too cheesy.

What does a skeleton say when he has lots of work?

"I have a ton of work, skele-ton."