Worst Jokes Ever
What do Hiroshima and Nagasaki share in common with balls?
They both drop.
I liked the chocolate mousse cake joke.
Guys, can we stop this stupid drama? I just wanna post my "Doin' Your Mom" lyrics and funny jokes! Please stop it!
I was at the club and then my dad walked up and said, "You're 15, why are you high and at the club?" So I ran. Then my uncle was at the car and took me home, so I was grounded. Then my boyfriend came because my parents went out and we had sex and we were very loud. My dad came home and walked in. He had my boyfriend pin me against the wall so my dad could spank me.
A bear and a rabbit are at a bar getting high, smoking weed, talking about nothing but lies and straight up garbage.
And then the bear starts to drink too much damn liquor, gets drunk, and asks the rabbit, "Can I have one more scotch, pretty please?"
And the rabbit says, "Hell to the naw, I'm not about to carry your drunk ass home with me and smell your breath."
Boy: "Mister, can I get candy?"
Mister: No, you shit head.
Boy: Why? :(
Mister: Because I'm not your dad.
Tell me orphan jokes are a really bad joke. People are really orphans, and there is a lot of 'em, and they are all depressed. Who would make fun of depressed people? Well, those dumbass evil people!!
What will happen if someone kicks you right in the balls?
You will be like, "Ow, my nuts!"
Where do rabbits take baths and wash their asses?
Where can a male and female rabbit make love at? The rabbit house or the rabbit hole?
What's the difference between an orphan and a dog?
A dog gets adopted.
I saw a cat. It said, "Raisin" when he saw a nut. Hahaha, I am a crappy joker. Put me in the nerd club.
What does an orphan call home?
Nothing. 🤣
Your mom's like a candy machine; she pops out for anybody.
When the guy asks the girl if she's wet, she replies, "Yeah, milky knickers!"
What phone do midgets use?
A MICROphone.
What do you call a taco in bed?
Es(tá co)stado.
What do you call it when a town on the south coast of England sprouts legs and starts walking around the country?
A walkie-Torquay.
The first time I EVER HAD SEX I WAS ALL ALONE. You know why?
IT WAS DARK and I WAS ALL ALONE!
A drunk walks into a bar and sees a beautiful woman at the other end of the bar and says, "Bartender, I want to buy that douchebag a drink."
The bartender says, "You can't talk like that! This is a respectable establishment, I'm going to throw you out!"
The drunk says, "Okay, I'm sorry. I'd like to buy the lady a drink."
The bartender goes to where the woman is sitting and says, "The, ah, gentleman at the end of the bar would like to buy you a drink, what will it be?"
She says, "Vinegar and water."