Worst Jokes Ever
We have life. I hope we have life. We have God in Jesus Christ. This is a good thing. It is a song part.
Why did Sally's pizza get cold? Because she has no arms.
85% of us are good at school, while the other 15% is good at suicide.
(Teach me your ways, 15%.)
Dad: "Honey, I'll be right back. I need to get some papers."
Me: "Okay." *Falls asleep.*
*Wakes up in an adoption center.*
Damn, it was those kind of papers.
My girlfriend's a two, but she's turning three tomorrow.
How do people in Alabama get circumcised? You knee your sister's jaw...
What do you call a crying dick?
I call it a crying dick.
Sat at a busy intersection with a slice of bread, waiting for a traffic jam.
Cut a hole in the rug so he could see a dirty floor show.
He took hay to bed to feed his nightmare.
Took a tape measure to bed to see how long he slept.
Put his nose out the window so the wind will blow it.
Died with his boots on because he didn't want to hurt his toes when he kicked the bucket.
Batman vs Superman?
Talk to me if you are online.
What do you call Kyson when he is banned on PS4?
A depressed Indian boy.
God said the first person to kill Hitler goes to heaven.
Hitler: Kills himself.
I asked someone why they were crying. They told me that they had to abort their twins.
Then someone yelled "DAMN DOUBLE HOMICIDE!"
So, once upon a time, there was a man who lived in his house with his wife.
He got up to go out to work and closed the front door behind him.
Not even four seconds later, he came back inside panicking, saying, "There's a rabbit with a gun outside!"
The wife replied, "Oh, don't worry, rabbits don't have guns. They can't shoot people; you must be imagining things."
The man calmed down for a few minutes, and after some reassuring, he eventually decided to try to go back out to work again.
So he stepped outside the front door, and the rabbit shot him.
What's yellow and can't swim?
A school bus full of children.
The cycle of Pionel Pessi:
- Ghosting👻
- Diving🐬
- Complaining to teammates😡
- Complaining to refs🤬
- Missing sitters🤦♂️
- Gets a lucky open net tapin⚽️
- Proceed to get 🐐 shouts
- Repeat🔁
People with REAL ball knowledge know he’s just an overrated tapin merchant 😭
There is one difference between autistic kids and vegetarians.
They're both vegetables in serotonin ways.
Why can't dinosaurs clap? Because they're dead.
I was digging in my garden when I found a treasure chest full of gold. I was about to run inside and tell my wife, but then I remembered why I was digging in my garden.
A transgender woman with cancer of the tits only has to pay for half the operation.