Worst Jokes Ever

Q: What do nuns and bathrooms have in common?

A: They both have glory holes for pleasing.

How did the person feel when his partner wouldn't perform a golden shower on him? Pissed off.

Patient: I am sorry, it is my first surgery.

Doctor: Don't worry, mine too.🫡👍

I think my butt looks flat, but my boyfriend seems to think the opposite. I told him to be deadass with me.

When I was feeling suicidal, I called the suicide hotline and they left me hanging.

How would negotiations between Putin and Zelensky play out?

QUEUE THE MUSIC

BANG BANG INTO THE ROOM I KNOW U WANT IT

My AI assistant told me it wanted to go deeper...

...into the algorithm. I misunderstood. Now I’m banned from the lab.

What does one saggy boob say to the other saggy boob? “If we don’t get some support, people will think we’re nuts.”

A vagina is like the weather. Once it’s wet, it’s time to go inside.

What did the mad penis say to the vagina? “Don’t make me come in there!”

Your gene pool is more like a gene puddle.

In Jr. high, we all had to do a report on euthanasia. I misunderstood and wrote a report on how I'd really like a Korean girlfriend.

Old McDonald cuts himself. E-m E-m-O!

You'd think with Jason being a pastor's kid, his parents would have gotten him Invisalign.

And an exorcism.

My Son: "Mummy, why is my name Thomas?"

Me: "Because the night you were conceived, I had a train run on me."

When you accidentally make your joke too dirty and get in shit from Explain Bear.

Q. What do you get when you cross Vince Li with a bus? A. A whole lot of people who wished they'd missed the bus that day.

If a woman named Susan gets murdered, is it considered a Sue-icide?

I can’t stand jokes about Germans.

They’re the wurst.

I got hired to work as a camp counselor for kids with ADHD, but I got fired. I guess I shouldn't have introduced myself with "Welcome to concentration camp".