Worst Jokes Ever
What do you call a helicopter, elephant, and rhino?
Hellephino (Hell if I know)
A book just fell on my head. I’ve got only my shelf to blame!
How many Senators fans does it take to change a light bulb?
All 3 of them.
Hockey for life!
What falls first, an apple or an Emo kid?
An apple, because the Emo has a rope holding them.
Why did the gym close?
It's because it just never worked out.
Why did the terrorist not go undercover?
Because he blew it!
I saw some terrorists on Family Feud. It looked like they had three strikes!
Kindly yeet someone!
Waarom staat de toren van Pisa scheef?
Hij had betere reflexen dan de Twin Towers.
Gently throw a baby off a ten story building!
Why don't we keep the balls rolling?
Jonny went to Disney and they had sour balls. He asked the cashier for some and he pulled down his pants.
You look like a cow went through puberty, put the milk before the cereal, then ate it with a fork with a little sprinkle of steak.
Where's is the candy, sir???
Over there.
(kid steps in van)
I don't see any candy.
Orphans don't like "Family Feud."
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They can't go to home plate.
What do you call an orphan?
Kyan.
There were 5 people on an airplane.
1. The pilot 2. The businessman 3. The Minister 4. The school child 5. The Smartest person in the world
The plane takes off, a good, solid 1 hour in. The pilot comes out and says, "OK guys, I have good news and bad news."
"Bad News is the plane is gonna crash. The good news is that I have 4 parachutes."
The pilot says to his passengers, "Well I'm a pilot, I fly planes. People depend on me!" Took a parachute and went out.
The businessman stands up and says, "Well I'm a businessman, I run companies!" Took a parachute and went out.
The smartest person in the world stands up and says, "I'm the smartest person in the world. No one is smarter than me!" Took a parachute and went out.
Now the minister says to the school child, "Well God has given me a good life. I want you to take the last parachute," and the school child has a massive smile on her face and starts laughing all of the sudden and the minister says, "Why are you smiling?! We're about to die!!!!"
And the school child says to the minister, "Well actually [we're] not gonna die because there are still 2 parachutes left because the smartest person in the world just took my school bag!"
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They can't run home.
Why can't orphans be gay?
There's no one to call "daddy."