Worst Jokes Ever
On Christmas, Mexicans wake up in the morning, then take a nap.
Joking, I know they work hard. They run all the way to the border to decorate the barbed wire.
I love it when cancer hits like a ton of bricks. The best part is when it kills people.
Things said by racist aliens:
"Some of my best friends are Green."
"I just know that Orange guy stole my spaceship."
"You're very pretty for a Purple girl."
"We know you Tentacletians like to rape everyone with your tentacles!"
"Adax Hitao should have finished off you Bluish people."
"You 2-headed people are so stupid!"
"No Slimatians are allowed in this restaurant because of health codes."
"Get out of my store you grigger!"
"The Plu Plux Plum meeting is tonight! Let's burn some spaceships on the Greenies' lawns!"
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends on how hard you throw them.
Two nuns were sitting on a bench. A flasher flashed them, and one of the nuns had a stroke... but the other one was too far away :)
What’s better than swinging a dead baby in circles over your head with a 5 foot rope?
Stopping it with a shovel.
Why do women have periods?
Because they deserve them, haha!
Justin Bieber
What did the brother cell say when the sister cell stepped on his foot? Ow, mitosis! (my toe, sis)
Your mom gay.
My wife purely hates me for me having sex with our daughter.
It's not my fault I couldn't wait to get out of the abortion clinic!
Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman... no other reasons besides that.
What do you get when you cross an octopus with a Mexican?
I don't know, but man can it pick lettuce.
What is the difference between me and the Twin Towers?
My mom was only airplane feeding me a spoon.
Question: Did you know that "diarrhea" is hereditary?
Answer: It "runs" in your jeans!
gbfhxgrbdivnhgfnvchyxrvdnfhbvgndbf c
What do you call Panera bread that has been weathered and eventually gathered and via cementation and pressure, it becomes a layer of different materials and is also one of the most common types of rock in the sea?
Panera Sed!
Did you hear about the "Funny Doctor"?
He'll have you in "Stitches"!
"Remember, switching to your pistol is always faster than reloading."
- Sun Tzu, The Art of War.
Yo, your hairline so messed up God said your hairline on the cross getting hit on that cross.