Worst Jokes Ever

What did the girl say to the white guy? “You have a peener wiener!”

You know where I get my soda? Mini-soda.

Fruit is like ex-wives.

They both look really good hanging from a tree.

Hands down, syndromes are bad.

I have something on my lip and I think I’m taller than you.

"Who am I?"

Have you ever said no? Did they keep going?

When Stephen Hawking entered Heaven and met with the Lord, after a short interview God asked: "Hey Stephen, I need you to explain to me how does all this stuff work?"

Why did the chef cook his eggs on the golf course? Because he wanted them par-boiled!

If Stephen Hawking was in a horror movie, would he make his robot try and shout, "Aaaaaaaah! Help me, I can't move! I'm too scared!"?

What’s the difference between a Canadian and a unicorn?

Nothing, they’re both mythical creatures.

How did the blind girl get a date?

She said it was love at first sight.

What do you say to a pig with no nose? You have n'ought a snout!

Dark humor is like a child with cancer...

Never gets old.

How many guns can an octopus hold?

9

What time is it when you get home? Can you walk me home, and then get home? Then I can walk you home, and walk home.

What time do dogs 🐕 get a walk done ✅?

Time to walk with your dog 🐶!

Jeffy: I need a new butt. My old one has a crack in it.

What's black and red/read all over? A baby skunk with a bad case of diaper rash!

My friend wasn't laughing at my jokes, so I said, "Is your funny bone broken?" But he got mad, and then I said, "Do you have a bone to pick with me?" He tried to insult me, but I said, "Call me what you want, I got thick skin," and this story was down to the bone.

What do Michael Jackson and ACN have in common? They both go in little kids.