Worst Jokes Ever
Some guy interviewed me and asked how it felt to kill thousands of people. I replied, “I don’t know. I’ve only killed communists.”
Roses are red. Violets are blue. My dad is gone to...
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?
Papaumamaumau papaumaumamau.
A man is depressed and he sighs. A bully says, "Stop sighing, you sound like some guys having a threesome!"
Q: What do Satan and a priest have in common?
A: They both love naughty souls.
What happens when a cow farm gets destroyed, then built up again?
It'll be udder renovation!
A dog walked into a tavern and said, "I can't see a thing. I'll open this one."
The humor of it is probably related to the Sumer way of life (and has been lost), but the words remain.
A dog walked into a tavern and said, “I can’t see a thing. I’ll open this one.” The humor of it is probably related to the Sumer way of life (and has been lost), but the words remain.
How do you ride two bikes at once?
You ride them in tandem!
If Opposition Expunged thought he was an animal, what would Thearchy be called?
Therianarchy!
Your mamma is so fat that she has a gravitational pull.
Milk makes you tall, right?
Well how did you get tall if your dad didn't come back with the milk?
Which dinosaurs masturbated the most? Triceratops, they were the horniest!
If you're taking notes in history class, aren't you just rewriting history?
Isn't a gaming console something people use to not be alone?
THEN WHY THE FUCK ARE 50% OF THE GAMES OFFLINE?!??!?!
What did the policeman shout to the cow running away?
"Get to the ground, beef!"
Why do orphans hate Cocomelon?
Because his mom and dad are in every episode!
I caught my wife this morning gazing at our marriage license of long ago that hangs upon our wall with tears in her eye!
Almost got teary eyed myself until she told me she was only looking for the expiration date!
What do you call a deer with no eyes?
No idea.
Bonus joke: What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs?
Still no idea.