Worst Jokes Ever

Believe in unicorns, and they'll believe in you!

Yo mama so short that when she plays mini golf, it's just called golf.

Which legendary Dutch wanderer slept for twenty years, except when he got up to pee?

Rip Van Tinkle.

I have no puns because I don't play soccer.

More jokes.

A joke.

Yo' mama is so stupid, she couldn't find a needle in a haystack.

Where did Sally go when she went in the minefield?

Everywhere.

Hey Autocorrect- STOP TAMPERING WITH MY CURSE WORDS YOU MOTHERDUCKING FORKLIFT!

What comes next in the pattern: ottffs?

So I walk into Orchids Of Asia. I come out three minutes later with the best massage of my life. What's the catch? Aye, there, matey, the catch of the day be crabs.

Yo mama so ugly, she made everybody's face fall off.

Idiot 1: Why are cows good in math?

Idiot 2: I don't know why.

Idiot 1: Because they have built-in cowculators!

I'd tell a science joke, but I was like, "Nah, it would get no reaction."

Nobody:

Me: "Nobody:" "Me:"

My family.

Velcro, what a rip-off!

Me: Knock knock.

Friend: Who's there?

Me: A broken pencil.

Friend: A broken pencil who?

Me: Nevermind, it's pointless.

The QUEEN is JACK! KING off the JOKER!

I know what you're thinking, pervert. Actually, the joke's about a jester in drag. OK, I’m joking, the Queen cheated on the King with the Jester.

I lost my job making storage units for the police after a week. I guess you could say it was a brief case.