Worst Jokes Ever
A student asked a teacher, "How do you pronounce this word? It's spelled A-L-L-I-E-D."
The teacher was about to answer, but then the student said, "Actually, I know how to pronounce it. I lied!" (allied)
A guy does not know anything. Oh, wait, he has dementia.
What do you call it when an orphan takes a picture?
A family portrait/A selfie.
Your daddy's so fat, he tripped over a rock. He thought it was a chip.
Question: Why does my teenage brother wear a cape to bed?
Answer: Because he can't sleep in his race car bed...
"Ow! You hit the spot!"
Why canβt an orphan go on the field trip?
Answer: They donβt have a parentβs signature.
What happens at the orphanage be like:
The orphans: βHE IS THE MESSIAH!β
What did one nut say to the other nut? "The guy in the middle's a dick!"
Me and the boys are cool.
How can a guy do stand up comedy in a wheelchair?
What do 7 year old girls want?
To be ate!
What kind of shit does a ghost take every time? A spooky dookie!
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Interrupting cow.
Interrupting cow who?
MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
I can't believe what just happened. I was at the bowling alley having a great time with my girlfriend when suddenly a man took all of our bowling pins! I asked him why and he said he needed more tapins to keep his career relevant. I instantly realized it was Penaldo!
So sad that orphans can't watch Family Feud. π
Q: What do you call a gay cowboy?
A: A jolly rancher.
Q: Why do we tell actors to break a leg?
A: Because all shows and movies have a cast.
If I fuck you harder, you have to scream "daddy," but what happens when you cum?
What did Jamie do after the sucky sucky?
He gagged!