Worst Jokes Ever
Last year, I gave my brother a BB gun for his birthday. He gave me a T-shirt with a bullseye on it.
I asked him what the bullseye was for. He said, "Target practice."
This was a few months ago. I used to help people load and unload inventory. One day I’m driving home after having lunch with my sister, and she asked if we can stop at the next gas station. I told her, "So you can weigh yourself on the truck scale?"
I just encountered a father and son moment over some milk.
The dad finally came back with the milk!
I complained to my dad why he never took me to the zoo.
He said if they want you, they’ll come get you.
I ran into a fat woman today. She said next time, don't hit me. I said I don't think I have enough gas to go around.
Then the ground started to rumble with every step she took.
I met a fat chick at the beach.
People started asking me what I use for bait, or do you want us to help throw the whale back in the water?
When I have sex, my girlfriend screams, especially when I walk in on her.
Tuesday, I was looking at my family tree, and two dogs were using it.
My proctologist used to be a photographer. He took x-rays and told me to bend over and say "cheese!"
Don’t be racist. Racism is a crime, and crime is for black people.
"Nice pants. Can I test the zipper?"
What did the beat say to the rapper?
"Drop it like it's HOT!"
Why did the rapper go to the bank?
To make some cash withdrawals.
Why did the rapper bring a dictionary to the rap battle?
For WORDPLAY!
Why did the rapper open a bakery?
To drop some SWEET BEATS!
What's a rapper's favorite type of food?
Wrap sandwiches.
How do rappers stay cool in the studio?
They turn on the mic and DROP THE HEAT!
What's a rapper's favorite type of FOOTWEAR?
Rhyme-n-Sneakers.
Why did the rapper get kicked out of the grocery store?
He kept dropping the BEETS!
What did the rapper say when he stubbed his toe?
"Ouch! That's NOT a sick beat!"