Worst Jokes Ever
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan? The apple gets picked.
I think the military shouldn’t allow trans people, because all they'd do is switch sides.
What's black and long? A line at KFC.
Why did my foot cross the road?
Because your ass was on the other side.
What's black and long?
- The line at KFC.
I bought some shoes from a drug dealer.
I don’t know what he laced them with, but I was tripping all day!
What’s a skeleton's favorite instrument?
The trom-BONE.
Why did Jeffery Dahmer not eat old people?
He does not like roasted vegetables.
Are you a toaster?
Because I wanna take a bath with you.
Your entire family tree must be a cactus, because everyone in your family is such a prick.
What do you call a gay guy on the BBQ?
LGBBQ.
Where did Joe go after getting lost on a minefield? Everywhere.
Dmitri! Where's my vodka?
What is another name for a stupid fish?
"Dum bass."
How many times can you subtract 10 from 100?
Once. The next time you would be subtracting 10 from 90.
I was going to buy a watch today, but I didn't have time.
What do you call a dog that tells the time?
A watchdog.
How many white police officers does it take to push an African-American gentleman down the stairs?
Push?! He fell...
I was confused when they asked me, "Do you know how to fly a plane?" Then, when I said, "No," they said, "Perfect!"
You don't need a parachute to go skydiving; you need a parachute to go skydiving twice.