Worst Jokes Ever

You want to hear a joke about pizza?

Sorry! Can't tell ya, it's too cheesy!

Why did the boy shoot the clock? He wanted to kill time.

A single sentence walks into a bar.

How many times do you tickle a squid before it laughs?

TEN-TICKLES

Josh: Tell me something funny.

Mark: My life.

A Nacho has a problem going on, and the Taco says to the Nacho, "Wanna taco 'bout it?"

And the Nacho says to the Taco, "It's nacho problem!"

What did the fish say when it ran into a wall?

Dam.

I have a lot of eggcellent egg puns, get the yolk... Oh come on, don't be hard-boiled!

I told my friend to watch Naruto. It's been a week since I've seen him. Hope he comes back in one piece.

Two Trojan warriors were patrolling the streets of Troy at night. It was finally time for their duties to be relieved. When they went back to their houses, one Trojan fell in a puddle. "Nitrogen!" The other called. And the other responded coldly, “Good night.”

[God creating sharks]

God: Ok give them 3 rows of teeth.

Angel: Seems excessive but ok.

God: And make them mean as hell.

Angel: WTF y.

God: BECAUSSE I SAID SO.

Angel:...

God: And make one of the types have a hammer for a head.

Angel: Why do I still work for you?

God: Because I’m the only employer as of right now.

A man says, "I'm flying!" He realizes he was pushed out of a plane.

Did you hear about the dead artist?

Too many strokes.

What does a tuna, piano, and a tub of glue have in common?

You can tune a piano, but you can't piano a tuna.

But what about the glue? said Bob I. I knew you would get stuck on that!

What's the difference between a homeless person and a car?

Only one gets fuel.

What knight is never wrong?

Sir Tain.

What do skeletons say before they eat?

Bone appétit. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

My version of the Roses are Red Poem in MW3:

I thought Soap could trust you. And so did I too. So WHY IN BLOODY HELL DOES MAKAROV KNOW YOU?!

Where do Sith get their clothes?

At the Darth Maul!

Why didn't the skeleton play football?

His heart wasn't in it!