Worst Jokes Ever
My wife wanted a boob job. I told her it was too expensive.
I told her all she has to do is take some toilet paper and rub it in between her boobs for a few days, and they would get bigger. She asked, "How is that supposed to work?"
I replied, "I don't know how it works, but it did a heck of a job on your ass!"
Why do G-Unit and C-Unit stand for? Gorilla unit and chimpanzee unit.
How come an orphan can't work for SC Johnson?
Because it's a family company.
Q. What does a Russian girl do when she gets unexpectedly pregnant?
A. Has an abortion.
No one:
Taeil: "Happy Christmas~"
Haechan: "It's Merry Christmas."
Why should you not let an orphan play baseball?
They don’t know where home is. 😢
Where does the killer whale go to get its teeth done?
The orca Don-tist.
I'm lookin' for some good jokes for the best song award. Can y'all help a fellow out?
Wow, Gwen even said she loves TJ! She just did!
Prince, look at it. You are going to be crushed. It is in bored jokes and it has 65 comments, look there!
Why does a woodpecker have a beak?
So as to not smash his head against the tree.
What's the difference between a hooker and a drug dealer?
A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again.
Why doesn't Adele swim properly?
Because she's rolling in the deep. 🤽♂️
Why do people love camping?
Because it's in tents!
Yo, sis, come here.
Sis: What?
Me: Oh, sorry, you doing school?
Sis: Yup.
Me: Can I go?
Sis: No way, you're going to hug me.
Me: I love you.
Why was the turtle looking at her phone?
She wanted to take a shellfie.
What is a good time for dinner, and what do I do? You can do dinner. Was that it?
Sally's mother had four children. The fourth April, the second May, the third June. Who was the first child?
Sally.
I called my dog J. They said, "Joné."
What do you get when Cayden steals your sandwich? A knuckle sandwich.
Why did the roster cross the road twice?
To prove it was not a chicken.