Worst Jokes Ever
What flowers are on your face?
Person A: What do you call the dangly bit of an octopus?
Person B: Tentacles?
Person A: Ok *tickles person B ten times*
What do you call a dear with no eyes?
I have no eye deer!
When I’m bored, I text a random number, “I hid the body... now what?”
Two priests walk into a store, and cops come up to them and say they’re looking for a child molester, and the priests both say, "I’ll do it!"
What is the real reason why men jack off? They just enjoy killing kids.
If you're fat and transgender, then would you be considered trans fat?
You're so scary that even your hairline ran away.
There are too many suicidal people in this world. I’m going to make sure there is at least one less.
Dagger. This is to get your attention, for Dagger Jr. and I. We'd like to speak with you, and possibly Lynx, if we can find a time to all talk.
What’s the difference between orphans and blind children?
None. Neither can see their parents.
Did you know that people say Michael Jackson only became a pedophile when he was white?
Lucky for him, if he was black he would have been found guilty.
"Explain bear is a homosexual, confirmed."
Your mom is so fat that when she went on the scale, it said, "I need your weight, not your phone number!"
I got kicked out of the hospital.
Apparently, the sign "Stroke patients here" meant something totally different.
What's the difference between a rubber and Michael Jackson? Nothing, kids touch them both.
What is Michael Jackson's favorite drink? Mi-hee-lk.
Johnny and Jill went up the hill to lick Jill's yummy candy.
But Johnny got a SHOCK With a mouthful of COCK Because Jill's REAL NAME?
Was Randy. 👹
What do you call an autistic kid with a gun? Glock 46.
Secretly, I’m a woman catfishing gay men on Grindr. When a notification from the app went off, my son told me, “I’ve heard that sound. Daddy has that game, too!”