Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

I was hunting at night for deer, and then I found one and shot it. I realized the deer I shot was actually my ex...

I was on a bus when this girl offered to blow me for $5.

...and never being a person to pass up a good deal, I gave her $5 and watched her do her thing. After she was finished she lit up a cigarette and started smoking right there on the bus.

I was disgusted. I thought to myself, "What is this world coming to? Who sells cigarettes to a 12 year old?"

A Mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "uno, dos..." *poof* ... He disappeared without a tres.

Him: What's the difference between Incestry.com and Ancestry.com?

Her: What?

Him: Nothing, either way you will be dating your cousin.

I respect anyone who devotes their life to charity work.

But I think Paul Walker went a step too far.

what is the difference between a basement full of dead prostitutes and a bowling ball in the basement?

I don't bowl.

How is smoking similar to oral sex?

The closer to the butt you get the stronger the flavor! 🤢

Two people are under the covers. The man says, "Quote the Beatles: Come together!"

What do you call a heterosexual man giving a brojob to another heterosexual man?

gay now, heterosexual later.

Guess how I got away from my mom saying I can't play Fortnite? I took my stuff and I ran to Iran.

What’s Brock from Pokemon's favorite food?

Brockoli.

Imagine the Russians showing up late to the 1917 revolution with a Tsarbucks in hand. They were late, so I guess they weren't Russian. They were probably Stalin.

An American is touring the Soviet Union. A Russian takes him to a school so he can see what it's like. He asks the kids if they like the Soviet Union. All of the kids say yes, they love it. All but one. That kid bursts out crying. The American asks what's wrong, and he cries, "I want to live in the Soviet Union!"