Worst Jokes Ever
What nationality is Santa Claus?
North Polish.
My roommate's diary says I have boundary issues.
What do vegetarian zombies eat?
Graaaaiins.
Where did Sally go when the explosion happened?
Everywhere!
What do you call a cow that just gave birth?
Decalffeinated.
Why is April the smartest month?
It can never be fooled.
They toss and turn to the sound of thunder, but I got watermelon to soothe my slumber!
I love the way the Earth rotates.
It really makes my day!
Hey girl, are you a drill sergeant, because you have my privates' attention.
My father is like Houdini. When he heard his girlfriend was pregnant, he disappeared.
What did the kid say to the emo?
"Don't leave me hanging!"
I bought an orphan kid an iPhone.
Guess what? It had no home button.
Why don't you fart in an Apple Store?
Because they don't have any Windows.
Man, I love this joke: Women's rights.
Roses are red, violets are blue, I have five fingers, and the middle one is for you.
I don't trust atoms. They always make stuff up.
What is Donald Trump’s favorite nation? – Discrimination.
America once was known as an Obama nation. Now we're known as an abomination.
Why did Steven Hawking die?
He lost Wi-Fi connection and didn't get the data plan.
What's better than swinging a baby around on a rope?
Stopping it with a shovel.