Worst Jokes Ever
How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb?
One to change the bulb and one to suck my dick.
Why don’t old people have sex?
When was the last time you tried pulling apart a grilled cheese that old?
Everyone: You gotta pay the cost to be the boss.
Germans: You gotta be the caust to be the boss.
My favorite place to make a bonfire? Orphanages, of course, silly!
My girlfriend wanted a marriage just like a fairy tale. Fair enough. I gave her a loaf of bread and left her in the forest, telling her we can get married once she makes her way out.
Why don't Chinese children believe in Santa?
Because they're the ones making the toys.
My son came up to me and said, "Dad, I'm depressed."
I pointed to the spare room and said, "Hang in there, son."
What do sex and food have in common?
Grandma makes both better.
A policeman walks up to a van with two priests and says, "We're looking for two child molesters."
The priests both look at each other for a moment and then say, "Okay, we'll do it."
What's the fastest way to get to the hospital? Stand in the middle of the road.
A boy asks his father:
"What is politics?"
Father answers:
"It’s very simple! You see, I bring in the money, so I’m big business. Your mother spends the money, so she’s the government.
Your grandfather sees to it that everything is managed in an orderly way. So he’s the law.
Our maid is the working class.
Everything revolves around your interests, so you’re the people. Your little baby brother represents the future."
The boy has to think it over. That night he hears his little brother crying due to a dirty diaper. He doesn’t know what to do, so he goes to the bedroom of his parents. There his mother is sound asleep. He goes to the bedroom of the maid, but his father is there fucking the maid — and oddly enough his grandfather is watching through the window.
Nobody notices the boy and he returns to his bed.
The next day his father asks him:
"So, can you now explain to me what politics is?"
The boy says:
"Yes, it’s all become clear to me!
Big business screws over the working class while the law watches and the government sleeps. The people are ignored and the future lies in shit."
Yo mama is so fat, when she nocliped into the backrooms, she was in level 0 and level 999 at the same time.
Whenever I go to bed, my wife disappears, but whenever I turn on the lights at night, she’s back in bed.
Does Eminem like M\&M's? Cause if he didn't, that would be like "they're" not liking "there."
How do you know if there's a vegan in the room?
Wait 2 minutes and they'll tell you.
What makes a 360 no-scope and JFK's assassination similar?
Both were some of the greatest achievements in history to achieve.
Yo mama's so ugly, she went into a strip club and got paid to keep her clothes on.
"How would you describe yourself in three words?"
"Lazy!"
What do you call a bunny with a bent dick?
Fucks funny.
Hatsune Miku is not from an anime.