Worst Jokes Ever

Hell hates freezers, England, and soccer.

Satanism is such an ugly word. I prefer the term, "red skin appreciation."

Kill yourself in any way. I'm killing myself the HIGHway.

They say the first time doesn't work, third time's the charm. Ha, not!

I told the emo girl to stop playing fruit ninja on her wrists.

What did the person say to the orphan?

"Where are your parents?"

Why did the cat cross the road?

To make a catastrophy on the road.

Why can't an orphan be gay?

They have no one to call daddy.

I saw an orphan in the grocery store and asked him, "Where's your mom?" and he cried. Why?

I replaced "Jingle Bells" with "Jiggle Balls"... "Jiggle balls, jiggle balls, jiggle all the way! Oh what fun it is to ride on jiggly balls today!"

Are you depressed? Go punch an orphan. What are they going to do, tell their parents?

I was swimming in a pool on my vacation when a fan of mine approached me. He said he wanted an autograph and gave me a pen to sign it. I accidentally dropped the pen in the pool. Suddenly, Penaldo came out of NOWHERE and dove to save it. He said he always dives for pens.

Today, I had an exam in school. When I was done, I raised my hand and yelled, “Pisstiano Penaldo!”

My teacher smiled and took my paper. She knew I was finished.

Official Dj Penaldo playlist.

1. "I'm a fraud" 2. "I need you (ft. Tap-ins)" 3. "I Want to Leave Mid United" 4. "Back where I belong (ft. Europa league)" 5. "TY Eder" 6. "Nobody wants me (Rejectnaldo Remix)" 7. "Fuck that kid (ft. Lil Broke phone)" 8. "Sewy (Benched +arms crossed version)"

What is a prostitute's favorite form of traffic control?

Speed humps.

What do you call a person who doesn't masturbate?

A liar.

Why can't orphans play dodgeball? Because no one misses them.

What do parents tell little boys to make them behave?

"Be good, or when you're asleep, Michael Jackson will get you!"

Girlfriend: "One day I will marry and a lot of men will be sad that day."

Boyfriend: "Wow, how many men do you plan to marry?"

I always keep anti-fungal spray with me... because I don't want to share my girlfriend with anyone.