Worst Jokes Ever
Why did Joey drop his ice cream?
He was hit by a truck. (Don't worry, the truck was fine.)
My bank loves me. They told me my credit card balance is outstanding.
What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in front of a door? Matt.
What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in the middle of the ocean? Bob.
What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in a pile of leaves? Russel.
Did you hear about the two-car pile-up in Mexico? Yeah like 200 Mexicans died.
Today was a bad day. First, my ex got hit by a bus. Then I lost my job as a bus driver.
Bob Ross fighting in Vietnam. "They're in the happy little trees, shoot the happy little trees and bushes!"
What did the deaf, blind, mute, and paralyzed baby get for Christmas?
AIDS.
What's green, fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you?
A pool table.
"Guess how I got to Germany so fast?"
"Because I was Russian!"
Rape jokes are the funniest thing to ever exist.
How many beaten children does it take to change a light bulb for a drunken father?
Apparently not enough to impress him.
Teacher: Where's your homework?
Student: At home...
Teacher: What's it doing there?
Student: Having a better time than me.
What did the Queen Bee say to the other bees? "Beehive yourselves!"
Chuck Norris once ran all the way around the equator and kicked himself in the back.
What is 80 feet wide and has 22 teeth?
Answer: The front row of a Trump Rally!
Why is a sick person and California similar? They tend to burn up.
A Karen is so stupid, she can't even cross the hairline!
You're so skinny, you could travel through a fax!
What do you call an emo committing suicide while filming it?
America's Funniest Home Videos.
Q: What do Burger King and Michael Jackson have in common?
A: They put meat on five-year-old buns.