Worst Jokes Ever
What's the difference between a gay guy and a microwave?
The microwave doesn't brown the meat.
Why are Trump's ties so long?
Because they go all the way to Russia.
What do you call a burning church?
Holy smokes.
what do you call a chicken who crossed the road?........suicidal.
I told my mum the refrigerator was running, so she got dressed and ran after it...
How many babies does it take to shingle a roof? Depends on how thin you slice them. -Hope Marie Lawson
what did the pedophile say to the kid?
"Roses are red, my name is Dan, I have a gun, get in the van."
What do you call a skeleton with no friends? Bonely.
What do you call a 5-year-old with no friends?
A Sandy Hook survivor.
4, 6, 8, and 9 have all been killed. 2, 3, 5, 7, and 11 are the prime suspects.
Roses are red, grass is greener. When I think of you, I play with my wiener.
So I got asked why I suddenly started wearing a beret, and I said, "Well, you never know when you need to pick a lock."
What's the best thing about abuse jokes? The punchline.
You're so short, when you were born, the doctor couldn't tell if you were a boy, a girl, or a Jimmy Dean pork sausage.
People with Down syndrome have a specific skill only they have; they can give a blow job and talk to you while sounding exactly the same.
Man: "Is your body from McDonald's?"
Woman: "Why, because you're loving it?"
Man: "No, because it's fat and greasy."
What is a Mexican's favorite sport?
Cross country.
I walked into a room full of men masturbating. They all looked shocked when I didn't stop.
I went to the zoo the other day. The only animal there was a dog. It was a Shih-tzu (shit zoo).
My ex-wife was deaf. She left me for a deaf friend of hers.
To be honest, I should have seen the signs.